Hello World, My Names Emma
by Dancesterx3
Summary: Emma Becker always wondered who her family was, but until she found herself knee deep in lies, secrets and backstabbing, she wonders if coming to Arizona was the best choice after all.
1. Chapter 1

Emma rolled over on her hip, his arm slid across her bare skin, he barely budged. She tucked her arm under her head and glanced at the clock: 2:18am. She had been laying in Thayers bed for the past two hours. Despite the slight sound of snores from behind her, she was restless. Images running through her mind. Thoughts, ideas, fears, anxiety. She had her chance to talk to Rebecca tonight and she blew it. No, Mads blew it. She couldn't stop replaying that moment. Part of her was pissed at Mads for blowing her only chance to talk to her birth mother. The other felt bad for hiding it from her friend. She flopped back down on her back, the darkness eluded her, the only sounds that filled room were Thayers soft snores and whir of the overhead fan. Why did Sutton not tell me in the first place? She kept wondering. All this time she thought her sister was on her side. Find our birth mother, she had told her that day at the bus station. It was something Emma had wanted since for as long she could remember. But having found Sutton. That was everything to her. Why was she all of a sudden on Rebecca's side. Emma sighed and laid her arm over her eyes trying to black out the already dark room. She needed some kind of sleep. She couldn't handle Sutton on no sleep.

When the sun rose over the bed, she felt Thayers fingers brush against her skin. Part of her wanted to push him away and the other was fighting the goosebumps that had seemed to form down her arm. So much for sleep, she thought as his eyes flitted open, "Good morning, beautiful." He said kissing her cheek. "I thought we could look at..." His voice trailed off.

She turned her face to look at him and for the first time he could tell something was on her mind, "I need to talk to Sutton." Partly cutting him off. Partly wanting to forget what she had done last night. It wasn't like the sex was bad, but the boy staring back her gave her an almost uneasy feeling, "I need to figure out what she knows about Rebecca. I know she's our birth mother, but why haven't they told me yet?"

"I honestly don't know, Em." Thayer kissed her again. "My dad said not to trust her. What he means by that is beyond me." Emma heaved a heavy sigh and pushed the covers off of her naked body. She looked back at Thayer, despite the fact that he had seen her in the nude last night, that was during a moment of passion. Her eyes met his and he understood her silent gaze. Standing up himself and making his way to the bathroom.

Sutton paced the living room of the cabin nervously biting her nail, a habit she thought she had broken years ago. When the sound of tires pushing gravel away stopped, Sutton made her way to the window. Peering out, she could see Rebecca getting out of the car and she flew out of the door, "What the hell happened last night?" She said making her way down the gravel driveway.

"Good morning to you too Sweetheart." Rebecca reached out for her daughter but Sutton pulled away.

"Don't even." She spat.

"Sutton, what's gotten into you?" Rebecca looked disgusted.

"Emma almost cornered you last night. You know, after they dragged me off to do God knows what with me and then hide the body." Then she headed back up the walkway to the front door. She stopped short and turned to her mom, "Why can't we just tell her?" She asked with honesty. It wasn't that Sutton was exactly ready to make nice with Emma, but all these secrets were beginning to take it's toll on her. She hadn't slept since she came back to Phoenix. Maybe it was because she was slowly realizing her mother had more up her sleeve than just getting her family together and maybe it was because she hadn't slept in her own bed since before regionals.

Rebecca looked at her daughter, "Because I'm your mother." She said almost coldly, "I know what's best for you and your sister. Emma can't handle all of this right now," She waved her arms between herself and Sutton, "She's been lobbying for Ted and Kristen since the beginning. Do you really think, she would be down for knowing her mother and twin sister have been plotting against that since the fight? Besides baby, Emma's too soft. Let's face it, you are me. evil and selfish."

Sutton waivered in nervousness, hearing her own mom calling her evil and selfish, despite the fact that it was true, sat uneasy in her mind. Sutton made her way to the couch and sat down, immediately began chewing on her fingernail. She wasn't sure exactly what she had gotten herself into and quite frankly, all she wanted was her life back but right now, she wasn't sure what the hell that was. All her life the people she had trusted in, who raised her, who cared for her and loved her had lied to her. Not just keeping the secret about Rebecca being her mom, but that they didn't even _want _Emma.

As a child, she used to have these dreams so vivid she swore it was reality. She used to describe them to Kristin in clear detail in the car on the way to school. Telling her stories of how her reflection in the mirror would talk to her, tell her what life was like on her side. Everything was the same, but backwards. While Sutton had the ideal family life, a little sister who looked up to her, sometimes to her own annoyance, her reflection was alone. While Sutton had two parents who loved her unconditionally and was surrounded by a close knit group of friends, her reflection was abandoned. She would ask dream Sutton what it was like to have a mom, even as a kid, she had something to complain about, but somehow her reflection was captivated. Now that she thought of it, her reflection had a name, that at the time confused her but today was very clear, Emma. In her dream she was close to Emma, they played in an open field nearby. Building forts out of scrap wood where they sat for hours talking, giggling, making daisy chains and when Sutton got older, in her dreams she would tell Emma about her crushes, and they would pick petals off flowers, playing the he loves me he loves me not game and giggled when it ended on he loves me. Even though Sutton was close with her real life friends, Mads and Char, she didn't have the relationship she had with Emma. At the time, Kristen encouraged Sutton to write about her dream dates with Emma. But today, she knew Emma was more than her reflection in the mirror, she was her twin sister. The twin sister her family lied to her about. She clenched her fists at the memory, "How could you do this to us?" She spat angrily at Rebecca who looked taken aback and surprised.

"What are you talking about Sutton?" She asked sitting next to her daughter, pushing a lock of hair off her face, but Sutton recoiled not wanting Rebecca anywhere near her.

"Why did you take her away from me? She's my fucking sister, mom! You know if _you _wanted nothing to do with us, that's your business but to take my own sister from me, how could even think about that?"

Rebecca tried to comfort her daughter, but she just sat there rigid, "It wasn't like that sweetheart. There is so much I wish I could tell you about you and your sister, but I just can't. Please know that it wasn't _my _idea to separate you two. In time, you will know everything. But right now, please know that this was in the best interest of you and Emma."

"No, keeping us together should have been in our best interest. Ted is my father, so he's Emma's dad, too. Why didn't he want her too?" She kept thinking back to her dream Emma. Her real life sisters life sounded exactly as dream Emma described. Back then, Sutton loved Emma. She still did, even though she realized Emma was real.

"There is so much you deserve to know, but right now, it's not safe. Right now, I need to protect my child." Rebecca tried to comfort her baby but Sutton just stood and spun around to look down at her mother.

"Well news flash Rebecca, I'm not a child anymore. I can't protect myself." With that, she grabbed her keys and made her way out the door slamming it shut behind her.

As she drove, the road became a blur, she thought back to her twin sister, even though she wasn't exactly thrilled with Emma's being right now, she was still her sister and right now, that was all she needed. When she came back to civilization she reached for her cell phone and dialed her sisters number.

"Hey, it's Emma. Leave it at the beep." Voicemail. Sutton threw her phone into the passenger's seat. It wasn't long before the faint sound of a Black Keys song sounded next to her and she looked at the caller ID: Emma. She reached out for it and threw it against her ear, "Hold on, I'm driving let me put it on speaker." She said and then sat the phone on her lap, "Okay. There you're on speaker."

"Sorry, I missed your call, I was in the shower." Emma said as the sound of a door opening sounded in the background and a man's voice saying something Sutton couldn't make out.

"Where are you?" Sutton questioned.

Suddenly fear swept over Emma, "N-Nowhere at home."

"Really?" Sutton questioned, "Thayer just happened to be there at 9 in the morning.

Busted, "Look Sutton, what I did last night is none of your business. What do you want?"

Sutton sighed, she wanted to bust her sister for having spent the night with Thayer, but right now, she just needed her sister, "Can you meet for breakfast?"

Emma laughed, "where exactly are we going to have breakfast in a town where everyone knows Sutton Mercer?"

"Meet me at the Starbucks off of St. George street. No one will know us there. It's not too far away from the tennis court we went to. Just please, Emma?"

Emma could hear a sense of desperation in Sutton's plea and sighed, "Yeah, just give me a few minutes. I need to get dressed."

"Thank you. Come alone." And with that she clicked off her cell and threw it back in the seat looking ahead at the blur of asphalt and upscale shops that lined the side of the road.

When Emma pulled up the Starbucks in Sutton's BMW, she switched off the ignition and looked around. Sutton wasn't there yet but she got out of the car and headed inside. At the counter, she ordered her new usual, soy vanilla latte no foam. It was "Sutton's signature drink" so said Char when she first became her sisters temporary-cum-semi permanent stand in. At first she despised it as she had never been into coffee when she actually was Emma, but she grew to appreciate the taste. She had found a seat by a large window and set her beverage down on the small table beside her. She pulled out her phone just as it rang, Sutton.

"I'm on my way, sorry. Are you there alone?"

"As alone as I was before I found out about you. What's this about?" She wanted to know but her sister who was a pro at segways just dodged her question.

"I will be there in five minutes, just don't go anywhere." Where would she go? Emma thought.

When Sutton arrived she looked frazzled. Her usually well managed hair was pulled back in a messy ponytail. Curls sprawling out every side. She place her aviator sunglasses on top of her head and found her sister. She looked at her twin for the first time since maybe they met with love. She reached out for Emma, taking her in hug that caught her off guard. "Okay, what has gotten into you?" Emma said when they pulled apart.

Sutton returned with the same coffee Emma ordered and sat in the chair across from her sister, "Can I tell you something? Promise me you won't laugh?" Confused, Emma nodded, "Okay. When I was little, I used to have these recurring dreams. I mean, they were always different, but the stories were always the same. They seemed to continue each night. They were about a girl. A girl who was alone in this world. She lived in my mirror and when we'd meet, she come to my side of the mirror and we'd play. She would ask me about her-"

"Her family?" Emma finished her sisters sentenced.

"Yeah, how did you know that?"

"I had them too. My friend looked just like me, we'd play in a field and make forts and talk." Emma smiled at the memory. She used to love those dreams. sometimes she wished she didn't have to wake up. Then a sudden realization popped in her head, "Was your friends name Emma?"

Sutton nodded, "Sutton?"

Emma nodded. Suddenly it hit them almost simultaneously, that maybe it wasn't just a dream, it was a place for them to meet. A place to know each other without being near each other on Earth. They spent an hour reminiscing. Talking about memories that they only experienced in their dreams. It was amazing how identical the dreams were, like one movie playing in two girls' minds. Then Emma looked at her sister, a tear-filled look in her eye, "why did mom do this to us?" She pushed back the sound of heartbreak in her voice.

Sutton took her sisters hand,"I don't know, I tried to ask her this morning but she gave me some BS excuse that it's not safe or some shit like that. But I'm going to find out." Suddenly Sutton's phone rang, Ted. "Shit it's my dad, just don't say anything." she put the phone to her ear, "Hi daddy." she said in a fake sweet voice.

"Where the hell are you? You didn't come home after the dance last night. Your sister said you were at Mads' but I was just there talking to Alec and Mads said she hasn't seen you since last night." Ted sounded a cross between worried and angry. Maybe it was because she hadn't heard her fathers voice in a while, but she almost felt bad. But then she looked at her sister. Emma had spent the night at Thayers. Anger raged through her, but she played it cool.

"I just went to see a friend, daddy. I am fine. I will be home soon." Then she made a kissy noise and hung up the phone and looked back at her sister, "So that was dad. He's worried because I didn't come home last night. So where did I go after the dance last night?"

Emma shifted in her chair, "Nowhere."

"Bullshit, you were with Thayer, Emma. Don't fucking lie to me! I'm sick of all this secrecy shit."

"Ok yes. Yes! I was with Thayer last night."

"Did you sleep with him?"

"What do you mean did I sleep with him? I didn't sleep on the floor!"

"Sleep, sleep with him as in sex, Emma. God you're not that stupid."

"It's none of your business, Sutton."

Sutton shook her head, then took in a deep breath, "Whatever, you can have Thayer. I've already had my rounds with him. Have my sloppy seconds." And with that, sweet sisterly Sutton was gone and in her place the old competitive Sutton was back.

"Whatever, Sutton. Are we done here, because I have stuff to do today. So if you're going to sit here and criticize me and my choices, then I'm done talking to you." She stood up and grabbed her Dolce & Gabana bag. But as she started to walk away, Sutton grabbed her pulling her back again.

She wrapped her arms around her, one last time at least for the little girl she used to spend so many nights with as a child, "Emma." She said almost an inaudible whisper, "I love you. I always have. For whatever reason life dealt these cards, you didn't deserve the life you were given. If I had known sooner that that little girl in my dreams was real and my sister at that, I would have come to you sooner. I know we don't always see eye to eye, but you will always be my sister. Somehow we are going to get through this together." She stifled back a sniffle, "We at least deserve to know why all of this happened."

Meanwhile, at the entrance of the coffee shop a man stood, pulling his sunglasses off his face, a devious smile across his face. Alec Rybak. When he saw the twins he headed over to them, "Well isn't this a beautiful moment, Emma. Sutton. Fancy meeting you here." And just like that, the beautiful moment between the girls was gone and in it's place fear stricken faces looked at his who just smiled back at them.


	2. Chapter 2

Kristen was just finishing cleaning the dishes when a knocked sounded from the door. Wiping up the last little bit of water on the edge of the sink, she draped the towel over the oven door and walked to the front door, greeted by a face she didn't want to see so early in the morning, "Good morning, Rebecca. What are you doing here?"

Rebecca shifted her weighted nervously looking at this woman in the doorway. Somehow she wasn't ready for this. But after Sutton's outburst at the cabin an hour earlier, she knew it was time things became a little more clearer, "Do you have a minute, Kristen?"

Kristen wasn't sure what exactly Rebecca wanted but she wasn't supposed to meet with Laurel for yoga until noon, "If you're looking for Ted, he had an emergency meeting this morning."

"I'm not looking for Ted." Rebecca looked pale, nervous. "I came to talk to you." She spoke those words so slowly. Kristen looked a bit confused but stepped aside nonetheless and allowed Rebecca into her home.

"Can I offer you some coffee? Orange Juice?" It was almost like her hostess side came out immediately, "Mimosa's? I know Ted has some champagne around here somewhere." Even though she wasn't sure how she felt about being alone with Rebecca when alcohol was involved.

Rebecca declined, "I'm fine. Thank you."

"So," Kristen said after a minute, "What did you want to talk to me about."

Rebecca didn't even look up at her, instead she kept her eyes on an outdated copy of People Magazine, "The affair." She quietly muttered, almost inaudible. Then she looked up at Kristen who just looked at her.

"What about the affair?" She cleared her throat.

"I mean, you know about me and Ted."

"If you're here to rub in my face something terrible that happened 17 years ago, then you can go ahead and leave. I'm over thinking about it." Kristen started to stand up.

"No. I'm not here to rub it in your face. There's something that Ted never told you." Then Rebecca's glance caught on a picture frame. A young Kristen holding a sweet baby girl. Even though she smiled, her eyes were hollow. Tired. She picked it up from the side table and ran her fingers over the baby girl. Her heart swelled and she fought back tears. The picture was taken only days after Sutton was adopted by the Mercers.

Kristen looked at Rebecca, "It was so hard to get her to stop crying long enough for me to take that picture." Kristen said gazing at the photo as well, "But she was a good baby. So calm. Sweet. Then she grew up. Almost over night." Kristen smiled it did seem like only yesterday she was holding this precious angel. Despite the fact that she felt pressured into adopting the baby, she knew that she loved her. She knew it was her job to take care of that baby and if for only a moment, she'd give anything to hold her one more time. Now that baby was a selfish teenager who sometimes gave her more trouble than it was sometimes worth, but nonetheless Kristen loved Sutton and had from day one.

Rebecca looked at Kristen, jealousy swept over her. She thought back to those 9 months. The only real time she had with her daughters. The nights she lost sleep to two babies kicking in the womb. The mornings at the doctors office, the sonograms, hearing her babies hearts beating. The morning of November 15th when she went into labor and 18 hours later held her two baby girls in her arms. All of this without Ted knowing about the twins. What she would have given to have had more than two hours with Sutton. "Sutton was always a good baby." She confirmed, even though the only time she had with baby Sutton was about an hour and she slept for most of it.

Confusion took over Kristen, "What are you talking about?"

"Sutton was a beautiful baby." Rebecca said pushing back tears and putting the photo back on the table, "I'm sorry. Maybe I should go." Rebecca stood up.

"Didn't you come here to talk to me?" Kristen stood up as well.

Rebecca looked at her, "You were lucky." she said softly, "You had her for 17 years and I didn't. Don't you know what I would have done for that chance?" Suddenly it hit Kristen like a ton of bricks and she put a hand over her mouth and shook her head. Rebecca just nodded, "I am Sutton's birth mother." She said it almost coldly.

"She's yours? Yours and..." Her voiced trailed off suddenly realizing that it wasn't just an affair but that something, someone-much less her daughter- came from it. Rebecca nodded knowing what the blond was trying to say.

"Just after I gave up Sutton, I had her footprint tattooed as a memory of what I lost seventeen years ago." Pushing back the sleeve of her dress she revealed a tiny blue footprint, her daughters name in cursive above the toes. Kristen whispered it softly. She went to her bookshelf, taking out the baby book she kept for both her daughters and opened the first page, looking at the same footprint she had made just days after taking in Sutton. Her name and birthdate underneath the black ink. It was identical.

"I can't believe he did this to me." Kristen fought back tears. It was one thing knowing that her husband cheated on her, but knowing that he got another woman pregnant and then raised that very baby? She wanted to throw up. She wanted to scream. She wanted to cry. All these emotions swept over her but she just sat there drowning in the news that she just received.

"That's not the only thing I needed you to know." Rebecca confessed. Kristen swallowed hard and looked at the other woman.

"What else is there, Rebecca?" And suddenly Rebecca was pushing back the other sleeve, revealing an identical tattoo and another tiny footprint. Only this wasn't Suttons footprint; it was Emma's and just like her sisters memorial tattoo, her name: Emma Jayde was tattooed in cursive above the toes. Kristen looked at the body art and shook her head, "So you have two kids?"

"Not exactly. I mean, yes. I do. But they aren't from two separate pregnancies. Emma is Sutton's sister. Her twin sister." Kristen suddenly felt faint and sat back on the couch.

"You mean Sutton had a twin sister?"

"Has. She has a twin sister. And you've met Emma."

Kristen just sat there absently shaking her head and trying to wrap her mind around this news, "Where is Emma?"

"Well, she's been here. She's been here for a while now. Sutton's been with me." Rebecca tried to sound calm.

"You mean this Emma girl has posing as my daughter for a while now?" Then it hit her, all those times when "Sutton" was so sweet, so caring. It wasn't the Sutton she raised. It was Emma. "I want to meet her. Officially meet her, as Emma." Kristen demanded.

"You can't just make that call right now. You need to play along. It's not safe for the twins to be 'out' right now." Rebecca said under her breath.

"You want me to pretend that Emma is Sutton?"

"For now, yes. If not for anything else, for Sutton and Emma. Derek Rogers died because he knew too much about the twins. It's not safe to even be having this conversation. But Sutton came to me in a rage about separating her and Emma and I just needed to do this for Sutton. For Emma."

Kristen nodded even though she had no idea what Rebecca was talking about, "So where has Emma been for the last 17 years?" She questioned.


	3. Chapter 3

Alec looked at the twins, "What are you two doing here?" He questioned.

"Just getting coffee, Alec." Sutton said trying to brush past him, but he stepped between her and the door.

"Well if I were you, I'd not play it so cool. What if Kristen came in here instead of me?" He spoke softly in her ear and she just blinked. Then he stepped back and smiled at her, "Have a good day, Sutton." Then he looked at her twin, "Emma." A cold chill ran down Emma's spine but she just smiled, following her sister out of the cafe.

"Ok that was scary." Emma said fishing her keys from her purse.

Sutton just brushed it off, "Alec has always been like that. Sort of that mysterious debonair. Don't worry about it." Then she looked at Emma once more, "We are going to get to the bottom of this, sis. For us, we deserve answers." Emma nodded and then hugged her sister. She wished that it was like the old days in her dreams. A carefree lifestyle, playing, telling stories, keeping secrets. But she knew better. This wasn't a dream. It was real life and someone had their grave already dug if someone knew about them.

Later that night, Emma was pulling the towel off of her wet hair when someone knocked at her bedroom door, "Come in." She called, hanging the towel on the coat rack in Sutton's closet.

Suddenly Kristen appeared in her room and she smiled at her, "Hey sweetie. How are you doing, Sutton." She struggled on the name knowing it wasn't Sutton who stood before her but damn was it freaky, this girl looked exactly like her Sutton and even though she understood how identical twins worked, it was hard for her to imagine two Sutton's.

Emma looked at her mom confused. Not that she didn't mind her mom, er, Kristen asking her how she's doing, it was more attention than any foster mother ever paid her back in Vegas. "I'm fine, mom." She smiled.

Kristens heart melted to hear Emma call her that. She so badly wanted to say her real name, but she remembered Rebecca's warning. Nevertheless, it was nice to hear Emma call her mom. If for no other reason than an almost smack in the face to Rebecca. She was Emma's mom and Emma was her daughter and one day it would be that way. Laurel, Sutton and Emma all together in one house. "I know this might seem weird coming from your old mom and all, but would it be at all ok if I could just tuck you in one more time? Like old times when you were a little girl?"

Emma looked at Kristen, taken aback at the odd request that a mother would want to tuck her 17 year old in for bed, but then again no one has ever tucked her into bed, "Sure mom." She smiled, "I was just about to tuck myself in actually." She sat on the bed and pulled back the covers, sitting on the edge, her hairbrush fell onto the floor.

"Do you remember when I'd brush your hair for school and you'd tell me about your dream dates with your friend? What was her name?" She absentmindedly began running the brush through Emma's damp hair. For once, she wanted to hear Emma say it, her name.

Fear crossed Emma's mind and she looked back at Kristen, "Oh, I don't remember."

"How could you forget such an important part of your childhood? You'd sit on my lap, barbie in hand and you'd tell me about this dream friend. You used to say, 'Momma, I love her. She's my best friend.' " Kristen smiled at the memory, knowing that this dream friend of Sutton's was more than just a dream mate, she was her twin sister.

Emma smiled, "Do you remember what I named her, momma?"

Kristen was braiding her pseudo daughters hair, "I think you called her Emma."

A tingle ran down Emma's spine, "Oh that's right. Emma." she repeated and for a moment that name rung in Kristens ears. "I don't have those dreams anymore. I kinda miss them you know. she knew everything."

"Well she was your best friend after all."

"After all." Then she laid back against the pillows and Kristen pulled the blanket over her daughters little body.

"Sweetheart," she was careful not to use Sutton's name, she wanted Emma to know this was directed at her and not the part she was portraying, "I love you. I loved since the day I met you." Then she kissed Emma's forehead and turned off the side table lamp.

Warmth rushed over Emma. Never had anyone ever brushed her hair for her much less tuck her into bed at night. But when Kristen kissed her forehead, Emma wished if for only a moment she could have been born Sutton instead. She brushed a lonely tear that escaped from the corner of her eye and tried to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

Warmth rushed over Emma. Never had anyone ever brushed her hair for her much less tuck her into bed at night. But when Kristen kissed her forehead, Emma wished if for only a moment she could have been born Sutton instead. She brushed a lonely tear that escaped from the corner of her eye and tried to sleep.

Laughter filled the open air, cottonweed spread for miles and she was standing there, smelling in the crisp air. The warm sunlight tanned her already dark skin. Her long brown hair whipped in the breeze.

"Hey." She turned to see her mirror image standing beside her. Her smile was warm and gentle.

"I've missed you," She said reaching out to hug her friend.

"It's been a long time. I know." Her friend said pushing locks of her own long brown hair off her face.

"It's not the same." Emma said.

"What's not the same?" Her friend questioned.

"Real life." Emma looked at the other girl and suddenly they were walking. "There's too much distraction. Too many lies. Don't you remember when it was just us? Why can't we have that in real life? It seems kinda silly to have to meet here when we're finally in the same city." The girls stopped at what looked like a pile of rubbish. Planks of wood piled on top of each other, a structure that looked like it'd barely survive a windy afternoon. But there, on the door, were two initials: EB & SM Best friends 4 eva. It looked like it had been written in black marker. Where the marker came from was beyond anyone's guess, but hey it was her dream, markers can pop up at the drop of a hat. Emma laughed, "Do you remember making this?"

Sutton dropped to her knees and looked at the writing on the door: Laurel keep out. Friends only. "Oh yeah. We made this after I had that big fight with Laurel. She was so mad that I wouldn't let her come to the biggest sleepover of the year. Even in 5th grade, I was still the one throwing the biggest bash in school."

"You were lucky to have her, ya know." Emma carefully opened the door of the makeshift hideout. Inside it was dark, only small cracks in the wood allowed for light to seep through.

Suddenly Sutton felt bad, she knew she had it all and Emma came from nothing. Sometimes it was nice to have someone to bitch too, but then she'd say something like that and remind Sutton that she actually had a decent life and made her bitching almost null and void. "I know that now." She followed her sister into the hideout. Inside they could see remnants of their childhood. Dolls with years of weathered wear tucked away in the corner, a coloring book. The crayons still scattered on the ground and there it was, the notebook that kept every secrets they shared during their meetings. Sutton picked it up and flipped through the worn pages. The writing was faded, but you could still make out some of the writing. Sutton's writing was large and bubbly dotting her eyes with oversized hearts and Emma's smaller more neat handwriting took up less space than her twins. "Em, look. Do you remember this?"

Emma looked at the book her sister was holding, "Oh yeah. I remember when we'd write in this." Then one sentence caught her attention: Sometimes I wish I had a mom like Sutton's. Her handwriting. Despite everything Kristen was an amazing mom and though she was lucky to have experienced such an amazing love, even it had to be behind the mask of her sister. She often wondered why Sutton took her life for granted. But behind the luxurious lifestyle, the picture perfect family, the social status that every teen girl dreamt of and the best friends a girl could ask for laid lies, secrets, deceit and murder. Maybe Sutton didn't have it so great after all.

"I've got an idea. Tomorrow meet me at the tennis court. 10 am." Sutton smiled.

Emma raised an eyebrow, "Why?"

Sutton smiled, "Don't worry sis. Just say you'll be there."

Emma smiled, "Fine. But you realize this is a dream, right? What if I go and stand there and you don't show up?"

"I'll be there, Em." Sutton smiled.

The next morning, Emma arrived at the courts where she planned to rendezvous with Sutton. Of course she wasn't there yet and Emma started to feel a little bit silly for actually agreeing to a meeting she made in her dream. Then the sound of a door closing made her turn around to see Sutton standing before her, a sly smile across her face, "Told you I'd be here."

"Ok this whole meeting in our dreams thing is starting to freak me out." But silently, Emma was thankful to see her sister. She wrapped her arms around Sutton and noticed two packed bags in the back seat of the SUV Rebecca had let her borrow, "what is this?" Emma said making a note towards the bags.

"Don't ask questions. Just get in the car." Sutton said.

"Sutton." Emma spoke firmly, looking her sister in the eye, "What's going on?"

"Well, I see you didn't get the element of surprise gene." Sutton joked but when she saw the look of seriousness on her sister's face, she sighed, "We're hitting the open road. Just two days. We need some sister time. We deserve it."

"We can't leave, Sutton. We have things we need to do here."

"I already talked to Mads. She's gonna cover for us. Don't you want this?" Sutton's big brown eyes met her sisters identical ones.

"I do, but-"

"After last night, after the memories of all those nights we shared together. We haven't had any time together. Alone. And I know that I come off self-centered, but damn it, I want this. I want some time with my sister. Please, Emma?"

Emma looked at her sisters big eyes, pouty lip and thought she must've mastered this as a child because it came too damn easy to her. She smiled, "Fine Sutton, two days. I take it one of those bags is for me?"

Sutton opened the drivers seat and hopped in. Emma followed suit, "Of course one is for you silly. I mean it's all my clothes but you've gotten used to wearing my stuff." She smiled at her snarky comment, a way for her to tell Emma that she was being sarcastic.

"Oh you're funny. So you have no idea where we're going?"

"Wherever the open road takes us." Sutton said putting her chanel shades on and pulling the visor down to check her lip gloss.

"In an Audi SUV. Perfect."

"Well you have the convertible. I mean if you want to take my car we can."

"What is a road trip without the wind whipping our hair?" Emma challenged.

Sutton smiled at her sister's sudden sense of adventure and opened the door and turned to retrieve the luggage from the back of the car.

Tossing the bags in the back of the BMW she jumped in the driver's seat, "Let's hit the road!" Though she still felt nervous about her sisters impromptu road trip, Emma got in the car. Silently, she hoped Mads would be okay covering for them while they were gone. She made a note to call her as soon as they got to , wherever they were going and suddenly they were on the open road, desert road for miles.

They had been driving for hours, stopping only for restroom breaks and food. But with so much desert land, food was a commodity. Sutton who was always so picky about her diet caved for road trip food and let Emma talk her into McDonald's breakfast, "What's a road trip without the road trip food?" Emma teased, "Besides, I think you're gonna be hard pressed to find anywhere between here and the middle of nowhere that can accommodate your picky eating habits."

"Well looking this good doesn't come from eating junk food." But then she looked at Emma, who looked exactly like her. Not just in the face but also in the body, they were both skinny petite girls and Emma rarely gave a second thought to her diet, "Alright fine." She pulled into the drive-thru lane of the nearest McDonalds.

Now it was getting dark, the sun was beginning to set behind them and the moon rise before them. Emma pulled out her iPhone, I don't have much service out here, are you sure you know where you're going?"

"Not a clue. What does that sign up there say?"

Emma squinted into the distance, "I don't know, something about lodging." As they got closer, Emma could make out the words better, "Hey there's a bed and breakfast at this next exit. Pull in there."

Sutton made a face, "A B&B? Really?"

"Well I don't exactly foresee a Ritz-Carlton popping up in the middle of the desert. It's the B&B or we sleep in your car."

Sutton sighed, "Fine. But I'm not partaking in any B&B-esque activities."

"No one said you had to. While we're near relative civilization, try and find a grocery store, we can stock up on some food items."

"Sooo you left adventurous Emma back in Phoenix, I see."

"Seriously, Sutton? We've been driving aimlessly for almost 7 hours, the sun is going down and I'm tired and hungry. So excuse me for not being all Christopher Colombus right now." Emma snapped.

Sutton put her hands in the air as if to surrender to her sisters attack, "Well okay then. Let's get you some food and some sleep."

Emma could see the disappointment in her sister's eyes. All Sutton wanted was an adventure with her and she was ruining it by being a bitch, "I'm sorry, Sutton. I'm just hungry."

"It's fine." Sutton replied quietly. They drove in silence until they got to the B&B. The Rosegarden it was called. A small house-like structure stood before them. A wrap around porch with several rocking chairs and a swing that look like they hadn't been sat in for years.

Emma picked up her bag, "Shall we?" She started up the stairs and reluctantly, Sutton followed.

Inside it was quiet. Only the sound of the grandfather clock ticked from the room next door. "Good Evening!" An overly cheery voice came from behind the twins and cause Emma to jump and turn around. A woman only slightly taller than her stood before them, "Please, put your things down." She said still smiling, "Welcome to the Rosegarden, my name is Gloria Stratton. Would you like to check in?"

Emma smiled a kind smile, "Yes please."

"And what is your name ma'am?" Sutton choked back a laugh and Emma gave her sister a look.

"My name is Emma. This is my sister Sutton."

"Identical twins? So nice that you two are here with us." Gloria was still overly happy to see them you'd think she hadn't had human contact in years.

"Thank you." Emma finished the registration and when she went to grab her bag, Gloria stopped her.

"Here, let me do that." Gloria said rushing to get the girls' bags.

"You don't have to grab it all. We can carry some too." Emma giggled.

"Nonsense. You pretty things just relax and follow me. You're in room 9. A perfect suite for two beautiful girls." Gloria grabbed the bags and headed up the stairs. The twins followed behind.

Emma gave Sutton a look, "Maybe sleeping the car was a better bet."

"You totally got ma'amed." Sutton teased.

****"Shut up." Emma giggled and elbowed her sister in the rib cage.


	5. Chapter 5

When they woke up the next morning, Emma looked at the clock, 10:35. "Shit, Sutton get up." She nudged her sister who was still asleep next to her. They hadn't gone to bed until almost 2:30 in the morning. After checking in they took turns showering and then headed out to the nearest Kroger's. Gloria, who was still "so excited to have them there" directed them to a small town about 20 minutes from the B&B where they ate dinner at a quaint cafe that reminded them of home and the country club. After dinner, they headed to the grocery store. Their room came with a microwave and a mini fridge, so they stocked up on microwave popcorn, sodas, cookies, chips, candy and even rented "Magic Mike" from the red box outside of the store's entrance.

Back in the room, they got in their pajama's and popped the popcorn and made a real girls night out of it. When the movie was over it was almost midnight and they laid in bed letting the food coma set in and they talked about everything under the sun, from Emma's life before Sutton to the life she lived now and even her relationship with Thayer.

"I don't know." Emma gushed, "He's just so sweet, ya know?"

"Oh, I know. But be careful with him, Em. He's not exactly the picture perfect guy you think he is."

"I know. I know he has a past. We all have a past, Sutton. You do, I do. Ethan does. And speaking of Ethan, what's going on there?"

Sutton sighed, "I'd rather not talk about."

"Oh come on, Sutton. I told you about Thayer."

Sutton propped up on her side, resting her head on her hand, "You didn't tell me about your first time... With Thayer."

Suddenly, Emma felt uncomfortable, "No. I didn't think you'd want to know about that."

"I don't mind. I mean, I already have a pretty good idea of how he is in bed."

"Ugh, gross. I can't believe you slept with him."

"In LA. Honestly, it was a huge mistake."

"Why did you do it then?"

"No no. This isn't about me. You have to tell me about your first time. Was he at least nice?"

"Yes, he was really nice and sweet and... gentle."

"Did it hurt?"

"Like hell. But then it was beautiful and wonderful and it was everything I thought it was going to be. But afterwards, it was just." Her voice trailed off.

"Just what?" Sutton edged her on.

"Nothing, it's silly."

"Oh come on, Emma. This isn't the same Emma I spent all those nights with. That Emma wouldn't leave me hanging like this."

She was right, in her dreams they talked about everything and left no detail out. Emma sighed, "It's just I kept thinking about... Well, I kept thinking about Ethan."

Rage boiled in Sutton at the sound of _his _name, "What about Ethan?" She spoke coolly.

"Would you kill me if I told you I might still be in love with him?"

Yes. Sutton wanted to say. But she remained cool, "I mean, I don't know. We're together."

"I know you are." Emma said, "And I love Thayer, but I couldn't stop thinking about Ethan. His face, his gentle touch."

Sutton remembered the night outside the Mercer's after Ethan was kicked out of Dan's place and he had crashed at their house. She remembered the look he gave her sister in the kitchen, that look of desire in his eye and he would have kissed Emma if his clumsiness hadn't stepped in. She knew all too well that she wasn't who Ethan loved, it was Emma and it killed her to even think that. In the end, she knew she couldn't make Ethan love her if he loved Emma. Sutton reached her hand out to touch Emma's, "He loves you, Em. No one can deny that and you know you love him."

Sutton's fingers laced her sisters and Emma turned her head to meet her sister's gaze, "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that life is short, and as much as it kills me, I want you to be happy. You deserve it more than I do."

"Are you telling me to go after Ethan?"

"I'm telling you to follow your heart. If that means going for Ethan, than do it. He will never be as happy with me as he will be with you."

Emma looked at her sister in shock, "Wow, Sutton. That was very... Grown up of you. Thank you." And she moved to wrap her arms around her sister.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just know that if you hurt him I will kill you and if he does anything to hurt you, I will kill him slowly and painfully."

Emma laughed, "Thank you, Sutton. But I don't know what I am going to do about Thayer."

"Well unless you're going for that brother-husband lifestyle, you might want to start by breaking up with Thayer."

"But that will crush him."

"Do you want Ethan or not?"

"I do, but-"

"But nothing. You're gonna break hearts, Em. Take it from the heartbreak master. Thayer's a big boy, he'll get over it."

Suddenly, the conversation transitioned, a moment of silence and then Emma spoke, "Sutton?"

Now Sutton was laying on her back, her arm draped over her forehead, eyes closed, "Hmm?"

"If you had known you were a twin, would you have still wanted me in your life?" Emma's question waivered in nerves. She was certain her sister would say yes, but all those years of never being wanted made her wonder if her sister would have at least wanted her.

Sutton opened her eyes and looked at Emma, "Em, of course. You're my sister. I know that we aren't exactly from a picture perfect family, actually we are the product of an affair, but if I had known you were alive, I would have done anything to find you. I'm glad I finally did."

Emma smiled at her sister's words, "I just don't understand how you got everything and I ended up with nothing."

"It doesn't seem fair. I'm going to find answers."

"Promise me you won't ever leave?" Emma voice sounded desperate. For the last few month's she'd been in Phoenix she feared what would happen when Sutton wanted her life back. Would she just find out who her family was just to be cast out into the world with nothing? At this point and after everything that had happened back in Vegas, Emma knew that even the system wouldn't take her back. After all, she was almost 18 and by then foster kids were often sent out into the world to fend for themselves. She feared that would be her. Where would she go? where would she live? A tear slipped down her cheek and Sutton watched it fall, splashing on Emma's forearm.

"Emma, I will never, ever leave you. Dad won't leave you. I can't say much for mom, but Kristen loves you."

Emma cracked a small smile, "She thinks I'm you. She loves you. How will she feel when she realizes we've all lied to her and I'm not her daughter. You are." Little did she know that last night in her room Kristen was knowingly speaking to Emma and the last thing she said to her was the truth.

"I've known Kristen for 17 years. Even if she was hurt by the lies that Dad and Rebecca created, she's not going to take it out on us. We aren't the problem. We are just innocent kids. We didn't ask to be born into this." Sutton wrapped her arms around Emma and held her firmly reassuring that this wasn't just going to disappear. They were sisters and together they stood as a force to be reckoned with. Together they knew that they were going to find the answers and maybe, just maybe, share this friendship not in the middle of the desert or in their dreams where it all began.

By the time they'd calmed down, conversation fizzled out and they began to settle into sleep, it was well into the night. Now it was late morning and Sutton was still half asleep, "We missed breakfast." Emma said walking to the bathroom.

"When you have nothing planned, you can't miss anything. That's the beauty of it." Sutton said still working on waking up. This was the first time Emma and Sutton had been in the same place overnight and she was beginning to realize the differences in them. While Emma popped up like a pop-tart in the morning, Sutton laid falling in and out of sleep until she eventually dragged her ass out of bed.

"What do you want to do today?" Emma said putting toothpaste on her toothbrush, "We're about 20 minutes from Albuquerque, anything to do there?"

"Have you been googling this morning?" Sutton questioned her sister. Now she was up and pulling clothes out of her suitcase.

"No!" Emma protested. Even though she may have pulled up a map in her iphone this morning, she didn't want to let her sister down. She knew that the element of surprise was important to Sutton.

Sutton just smiled and nodded, "Uh huh."

"No. I swear."

"So did you find anything exciting?"

"Sutton, all I did was figure out where we are."

"We will find something. If anything we will make our own fun."

They finished getting ready and then headed downstairs, bags in hand. "Well good morning, girls." Gloria said with her unfading joy. "Leaving us so soon?" Her face twisted into a pout even though she probably wasn't all that sad to see them go.

Emma smiled, "Yeah. We are gonna explore the city some and then head back home."

"You never did tell me where home was."

Home. Something Emma never had. To even _consider _Phoenix her home meant everything to her. She smiled at the woman, but before she could say anything, Sutton spoke up, "we're from Phoenix, Arizona." She gave Emma a that's your home too smile. Sometimes that twinsense thing really freaked Emma out.

"Phoenix. So where is your mom? You girls seem a little young to be out all alone in a town you aren't from."

Neither of the girls felt like thinking about Rebecca right now. She was pretty much the reason why they escaped to New Mexico in the first place, "Oh this is a graduation trip." Sutton lied, "She let us take a few days to go out on our own. Actually, we are going to tour UNC later today."

"Oh!" Gloria clapped her hands together, "UNC is a wonderful. I graduated from there. Do you know what you would like to study?"

Sutton sighed, clearly agitated by the woman's constant questioning, "We are actually going to be late for our appointment. So if you don't mind."

"Oh no of course not!" Gloria said, "Well let me help you bring your bags to your car."


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note: I wanted to clarify that in my last chapter, I meant to say they were visiting UNM (University of New Mexico) not UNC (University of North Carolina). So just so you know that when I mention UNM in this chapter, I initially meant that school.**

Ted Mercer walked up the driveway of his house, shuffling through the mail when something caught his eye. Sutton's debit card bill, because he was a cosigner on the account, he opened the bill running down the list of usual chargers, this high end store, that high end store and almost every other was a charge to Starbucks. But the very last charge almost $300 to some inn in New Mexico, "what the hell?" He said to himself. He reached for his phone and looked up the phone number to the inn.

"Thank you for calling the Rosegarden Inn in Albuquerque, New Mexico. My name is Gloria how can I help you?"

"Hi, yes, my name is Dr. Ted Mercer, I just saw a charge on my daughter's account to your institution. I think that was a mistake."

"I'm sorry, sir. What is your daughter's name?"

"Sutton. Sutton Mercer."

"Oh yeah. She and her sister just left this morning." Gloria said, the faint sounds of fingers on a keyboard in the background.

"I don't think so. Laurel, her sister, has been home all day."

"Her sister said her name was Emma. Such sweet girls. She said your wife let them take a road trip to visit UNM." Then she sighed a breath of delight, "UNM is a wonderful campus, I gradu-"

Again she was cut off, "What do you mean her sister Emma?"

"Her twin sister, Emma. Sir, is there something I can help you with?"

"No. thank you. You helped a lot. Have a good day." Then he clicked off the call and scrolled his contacts, "answer your phone…" he said to him self.

"Hello?" came a voice on the other line.

"That sign said this way to the Petroglyth national monument. Let's go." Emma said pointing at the passing Exit sign.

"What is that?" Sutton questioned.

"Who cares? Where's your sense of adventure?" Emma teased her sister since all day yesterday Sutton pestered Emma about her lack of adventure. Sutton just glanced at Emma and pulled off the Exit. "there she is." Emma laughed.

When they pulled up to the monument there were people milling around, "So what is this?" Sutton said after several minutes of sitting in the parking lot. It looks like some kind of monument in history. There's like writing on the wall or something. I don't know, it looks kinda cool."

Sutton rolled her eyes, of course Brainiac Emma would find something historical "cool" but if she protested she would only get more hash about her lack of adventure and since there probably wasn't a six flags nearby she decided to please her sister. After all, it was this or go back to the life of lies and secrets where Emma barely existed, "Alright let's go."

The girls looked up at the huge monument before them. At the entrance they grabbed a map and Emma stopped to plan their visit. "So basically, it's a really old volcano that people drew pictures on?"

"Pretty much." Emma said as she headed up the steps of the monument.

"So there were two babies?" Ted tried to wrap his mind around this. He sat in Alec's living room, Rebecca across from him, she reached for his hand.

"I thought Alec told you." She said honestly, "he told me he was going to tell you."

Ted made a disgusted face, "Alec didn't tell me shit."

"Oh Ted," Rebecca said her voice was calm and sweet, she gave his hand a squeeze.

"What's her name?" He asked coldly.

"Emma. Emma Jayde. She's perfect, Ted. Just like her sister."

"How long has she been in Arizona?"

"A few month's now. You've met her, Ted. You just didn't know it."

"What do you mean, I've met her?" His anger surged through him.

Clearly he wasn't as on the ball with it as Kristen was, Rebecca drew in a breath, "She's been filling in for Sutton."

"Where the hell is Sutton?"

"She's safe. She's been with me, actually. We were rekindling our mother-daughter relationship."

"And Emma?"

Confused Rebecca looked at Ted, "What about Emma?"

"Does she know about you. You know, you being her birth mother? I'm her father?"

"No. Not yet. But I'm going to tell her. I haven't seen either of them in a few days."

"They've been in New Mexico."

"What the hell is in New Mexico?"

"Not us," Ted gave a small chuckle, "I got Sutton's bill in the mail this evening. Seems she and Emma took a trip to New Mexico to check out UNM."

"Since when did either of them have interest in UNM?"

"I don't think they went to go look at schools. I think they went to get away."

Rebecca scoffed, "I don't blame them."

Though he was still angry that his best friend lied about the single most important thing in his life, he felt better after talking to Rebecca. He didn't leave immediately, instead he stayed. Alec had gone to a conference and was going to be gone all night so Rebecca welcomed him in. They were halfway through a bottle of champagne when Mads walked, "Oh. Um, Hi, Mr. Mercer. I'm, um, I gotta go." and she scurried up the stairs.

Ted and Rebecca both laughed on Mads' behalf, "She must know where the girls are." Ted said.

The twins had spent a good portion of the late morning at the monument, by noon, they decided it was time to head back to Phoenix and back to the incognito life that they'd somehow mastered like a perfect tango. It was late in the afternoon, the wind whipped Sutton's hair as she cruised to some hip hop playlist she made with Mads and Char last summer before school began. She looked down at Emma, whose head was resting on her sisters shoulder and was completely passed out. She smiled and let her mind wander. Ideas of what life would have been like with Emma around. Did she have movie nights with her foster families like she had with her family? Would she team up against Laurel and play together just the two of them? She remembered the afternoons after school when she'd play outside with Laurel, riding her bike around the neighborhood and playing freeze tag with Mads and Char. She thought about trick or treating and what it would be like to switch places in school. Christmas mornings sneaking downstairs to spy anything that Santa had brought them. All these memories, Laurel was always by her side. But she still wondered what it would have been like with Emma there too? Would she have been her partner in crime growing up instead of Laurel? Emma slowly began to stir, her eyes fluttered open and she realized that she'd just fallen asleep on her sisters shoulder, "Oh my God, I'm sorry." She said embarrassed.

Sutton laughed, "It's okay. It was cute."

Emma, still embarrassed, laughed a little and sat up straighter in her seat. She looked at her sisters iPhone, "What are you listening to?" She scrolled down the list of songs not one song on there she had heard of.

"Oh it's an underground playlist of local hip hop artists, Mads, Char and I collected music all last summer and made playlists of our favorite songs." Emma smiled, last summer she was alone. In Vegas. Forced to fend off her pervy foster brother, Travis. Her only friend was Lexi and they never did anything as cool as the things Sutton did with her friends, "You can change it if you want to."

Emma switched to a country station on her pandora app, a Luke Bryan song blasted through the speakers, somehow the idea of blasting Country in a convertible in the middle of the desert seemed so appropriate, "I love this song!" She shouted over the music and then threw her hands up in the air. Living the last few minutes she had as Emma Becker to the fullest.

When they pulled up to the cabin, Sutton killed the ignition. She gave Emma her key and was about to give Sutton a hug before heading home when the Cabin door flew open, "Hello girls." A voice called from the porch. Both girls stopped dead in their tracks and stared at the person standing before them, both looking like deer in headlights.


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's note: Ok so I wasn't exactly feeling this scene. I know where the story is going to end up but all of the little details to get there are a bit hazy so I am going with the flow. So if this chapter feels weaker than the others, I apologize. Next chapter is going to be a bit of a rollercoaster ride and will most likely be a lot longer. So keep that in mind. Thank you all SO SO much for reading! It means the whole world that you guys are keeping up! :) Enjoy Chapter 7!**

Neither twin had the slightest inclination of what to do next and Ted just stood there. Confused. Shocked. Then Emma smiled, "Hi daddy." She said. Even though she was still in the dark about her birth father, she didn't know what else to say. Calling him Mr. Mercer just didn't feel right.

Ted smiled at that greeting and walked down towards her, "Baby." He said taking her in his arm, "You're Emma, right?" She nodded against his shoulder, finally happy that at least he knew about her.

"How did you know?" Emma asked pulling from his embrace.

"I got Sutton's bank statement in the mail."

Sutton's brow furrowed, "You read my mail?"

Ted looked at his daughter, that fatherly look on his face, "My name is on that account missy. I have every right to look at it." Then he turned and looked at Emma, "I saw the charge from the inn in New Mexico. I didn't know what it was, so I called them."

"You called them?!" Sutton stomped her foot in a huff. Even though she was angry that her dad pried in her business, she let it roll off her back. The fact that he stood before them, both of them and was actually happy made her wonder, "How did you know about Emma?"

Ted turned to Sutton, "I talked to Rebecca." Then he looked back at Emma, "There's some things you need to know."

The three of them headed into the cabin and Ted offered to make some coffee. While they waited for the coffee to brew, he joined Emma and Sutton on the couch where they sat next to each other, Emma's legs propped on her sisters lap. When Ted joined them she sat up straighter. Nerves ran through Ted like a raging bull, "Emma, honey. I need you to know that I didn't know about you. When you were born Rebecca only told me about Sutton. That's why I raised her."

Confusion took over Emma, even though she'd speculated about Ted being her biological father, nothing was confirmed and up until now it was just side conversation she'd had with Thayer, "What do you mean?"

Ted took his daughters had and a single tear trickled down his cheek, "Honey, I am your dad. Your biological dad, I mean."

Emma fought back joy and wrapped her arms around her father, "I thought it was you! But I didn't know for sure! And I'm so glad you confirmed that." Then she looked at Sutton, "But wait. Did you know he was our father?" Sutton just nodded slowly, "So why didn't you tell me? After all of this, I trusted you. Why couldn't you tell me?" Now she was mad, no not mad, hurt. How could her sister hide something so important from her? After all that they'd shared in New Mexico and she couldn't even give her the kindness of telling her who her father was?

"It's not like that!" Sutton spat back in defense, "It's not my place to tell you those kinds of things. Dad should have been the one to tell you. Rebecca told me. I would have killed to hear him say it to me."

"Girls, please." Ted protested, "Emma, I didn't know there were two babies. I found out because the woman at the inn told me my daughter was there with her sister. Her twin sister. At first, I thought the woman was postal but when Rebecca confirmed it, it was real. I would have done anything for my two girls. I need you to know how much I love you. I know that may be difficult to see in the tragedy of everything, but I love you more than you will ever know." Emma bit back tears, her whole life she spent wondering who she was, where she came from and after seventeen years she was finally figuring it all out. Emma was getting her family. The family she'd always wanted. When Ted realized she was crying, he reached out and wiped the tears away, pulling her from her seat into his arms, "Come here baby girl." He said hugging her tightly.

"What about me?" Sutton protested and from the hug, Emma reached out pulling her sister into her arms.

"My baby girls." Ted could barely contain himself. Sutton, Emma and Ted all stayed there in that moment, a moment they should have shared seventeen years ago.

"So I have to ask you dad," Emma started after they'd pulled out of the hug, she was now stirring a cup of coffee and returning back to the couch, "What happened seventeen years ago?"

"I don't know everything. I wasn't even there the day you girls were born. All I know is I get a call from Alec telling that Rebecca had given birth to Sutton and arranged for Sutton to be my adoptive daughter. Never did Alec ever say anything about a second baby and after that it was to be never spoken about ever again. Rebecca left town and I was left with Sutton, my daughter."

Emma shook her head, "So what happened to me?" She wondered looking into the swirling light brown liquid in her mug, the steam warmed her face.

"I don't know baby. I tried asking Rebecca why she only gave me Sutton but she avoided the question. Alec has answers but that's like trying to break the Queen's guards. He won't break."

"This is ridiculous. I need to know why Rebecca would separate us." Sutton said, "I mean it really pisses me off that she did that. I mean no offense to Laurel, but I would have liked growing up with my twin sister."

Ted nodded, "I know, sweetie." Sometimes it was good to just vent. If it helped his daughter's cope with their past then he would be there all day to listen, to speculate, to talk. After all, it was the first time he'd been in the same room with his twins and he wasn't exactly ready to let this moment just pass, "I promise you that I will find out whatever I can. I am your father and I'm going to get my family back. My twins, Laurel, Kristen. I will do anything to have that back."

Ted was just about to head out when his phone buzzed, _Think twice before you make such grandeur statements, ted. _The number was blocked. Ted looked around the cabin, no one aside from his girls were in sight and both twins' phones were sitting on the table in the kitchen, he knew it wasn't either of them who had sent this mysterious message. Not to be spooked too soon, Ted deleted it and hugged his girls just before leaving.


	8. Chapter 8

Emma decided to spend one more night in the cabin with her sister. Ted promised he would keep the secret of the twins from Kristen just long enough to get answers from Alec or Rebecca. The girls were just settling down with some popcorn and a movie when Sutton's cell phone began to ring, "You wanna get that?" Emma said indicating her ringing phone.

"No, it's probably just Ethan or something wanting to come over." Sutton said setting up the DVD player. A knot built in Emma's stomach, "I'll call him back."

It wasn't but a few seconds when Emma's phone rang, "What am I like your last choice?" She joked, but didn't answer her phone. the girls had just began the movie when Sutton's phone rang again.

"What the hell?" Sutton moaned, not wanting to get up.

"Just answer it. Tell him to come over if you want." Emma offered even though she just wanted the night to be with just Sutton.

"Fine." Sutton grumbled and got up, "Hello?" She said answering her phone, "What? What? Rebecca slow down." Suddenly panic filled Sutton's voice and Emma sat up giving her sister a what's going on look, but Sutton just ignored it, "Yeah oaky. I'm coming." Sutton chucked her phone into her purse that was sitting on the counter beside her phone, "Get up." She instructed to her sister.

Emma stood up, "What's going on?"

"Just get up. Go put real clothes on." Sutton's voice was flustered. Emma knew something was wrong, but she did what her sister told her. When Emma came back out dressed in the clothes she had worn the day before, she looked for Sutton who had also gotten dressed and was heading down the hallway.

"Will you tell me what the hell is going on?" Emma said when they got in Sutton's car, she was worried the whole time she put her clothes on. All she knew was that whatever happened, Rebecca knew about it.

Sutton chewed the bottom of her lip, tears filled her eyes and she stared straight ahead, the dark country road blurring behind her tears, "Dad was in an accident."

Emma felt all feeling flood from her body, "Is he okay?"

But all Sutton did was breakdown forcing herself to pull over in order to gather herself. When she had just enough control she looked at Emma, "No. He's in a coma." But the words alone made her break down again.

Emma sat in the passengers side, she stared out the windshield now, the dark road consumed her. She didn't know if she could cry. She had only just met this man a few months ago, but he was her father. He confirmed that tonight. Emma looked at her sister the tears came down in sheets now, she reached across the center console and took Sutton's hand, immediately Sutton responded, lacing her fingers between Emma's, "Do you want me to drive?" She whispered. At first Sutton didn't respond then after a moment, she nodded and opened the car door.

After they switched places, Emma drove the way to the hospital remembering the way after the night Laurel fell from the wall at Rebecca's. When they arrived the hospital was swarming with other patients, family members all in the same state as Sutton, milling around, confused and wondering, too, where their family members were. Emma, who was still the strong one in all of this found a nurses station. A young blond behind the desk popped her gum and typed something on the computer, "Excuse me?" Emma's usual meek tone was a bit sharper now.

The blond who was clearly annoyed that this girl had interrupted her current work slowly looked up at her, "Can I help you?" But the tone in her voice said otherwise.

"Yeah, We are looking for Dr. Ted Mercer." Emma said squeezing Sutton's hand reassuring her that everything would be alright.

The blond began typing, "I'm sorry, Dr. Mercer doesn't work at this hospital." She said and then went back to her previous work.

Emma stood there, suddenly realizing the girl must have thought she was looking for a doctor and not a patient, "No, he's a patient. He came in about an hour ago. It was a car accident." The words alone made her stomach flutter, however remained calm and together. Sutton was still an emotional wreck. Even though she'd stop crying, she was still dragging in breaths and sniffling. Her eyes and face were red as tomatoes and she still looked disconnected and out of it.

Then blond huffed, Emma made note to talk to her father about the attitude of some of the nurses after all of this was done with, and began typing again, this time she looked at Emma, "He's in room 302. Up two flights and down the hall to the left." Emma thanked the girl who said nothing but went back to her typing and ran to the elevator, catching it just as the doors were closing.

On the third floor, which was more calm than the waiting room downstairs, Emma made a left pulling Sutton along with her. But when Emma saw Kristen she pulled Sutton into a nearby bathroom, "I can't go out there, Sutton." she said.

"Who cares?!" Sutton snapped, whatever was going on with their father was more important than the secret of the twins, "Kristen's bound to find out."

"But not now. Not while her husband is in a coma." Emma declared, "Look, you stay here. I'll go home and you can call me later when you know what's going on."

"No, Emma." Sutton demanded and then looked down at the floor, "Please don't leave me?" Suddenly the mighty Sutton was letting her weakness show.

Emma's heart crushed for her sister, but there was no way she was going out there to announce herself as the long lost twin when everybody was in shambles. Yet, she pulled Sutton into a hug, "I love you, Sutton and I am glad you want me to stay, but it's not a good idea right now for me to go out there. I can't face Kristen right now."

The girls held the hug, somehow Sutton didn't fight back, maybe because she was too upset about Ted or maybe because she'd wasted all of her energy in the car on the way over here. but she melded into her sister's embrace just as the bathroom door swung open, "Sutton?" She said, but it was Emma's whose eyes caught the woman's.

Kristen who had come in search of tissues, was now standing there, Emma didn't speak and neither did Kristen. Then Kristen took a step forward, The real Sutton still had her back to her mother. Half of her was terrified for what may happen next and the other was relieved that finally Kristen can know about the twins so they could all get along with life. Kristen was the first to speak, she put her hand on Sutton's shoulder, forcing the girl to turn around, "I know about you, Emma." she spoke quietly. She didn't know if doing this was the right thing to do but what else was she supposed to do, pretend like the other twin didn't exist?

Emma, who was still staring at her let her face soften, "You did?"

Kristen, recognizing the real Emma took the girl in her arms, "Rebecca came over the other day and told me. She said Sutton went nuts on her and she needed to tell me for Sutton." then Sutton turned around looking at her daughter for the first time since she'd walked into the bathroom. Suddenly Kristen smiled, this was the first time she'd seen the two girls together. It was still so freaky to see her daughter's twin, but she still gathered them in her arms, kissing each girl and held them tight.

Sutton hadn't felt her mother's embrace since Emma took over her life and she had to admit that she'd missed it. She may claim to be a big girl and didn't need her mommy anymore, but right now, all she needed was her mommy. She sank into her mother's embrace and felt hot tears prick the back of her eyelids, "Mommy is he okay?" She whispered.

"Oh sweetie," Kristen whispered, to be honest, she had no idea. The doctors had been in and out of Ted's room since he came in but none of them gave any sort of information regarding his condition, "Everything will be okay. No matter what happens. I've got you girls and I've got Laurel and-" But then she realized Laurel, "Does Laurel know about Emma?"

Hearing Kristen say her name name Emma smile, "I told her after her fall. She's known about us for some time now."

"So I was the last to know?" Kristen sounded disappointed, like they didn't trust her enough to tell her. But then she remembered Rebecca's warning and she understood why the girls had kept the secret from her. All she knew was right now she needed her girls.

"Mom, they're looking for-" Laurel said pushing open the door, "Oh." Laurel didn't know how to act. Should she act surprised like she had no idea about the twins? Should she act like she's known all along? But then Kristen smiled at her daughter.

"Laurel, honey, I was just comforting your sisters. Come here." Then pulled Laurel into the group hug she already shared with Emma and Sutton. Laurel wrapped her arms around her new sister and her mom squeezing them into her. Laurel had been just like Sutton in the situation, her face looked tired and worn down like she'd been crying too. Sutton grabbed Laurel's hand and gave it a squeeze exactly as Emma had done for her earlier. It was Sutton's way of telling her little sister that she was there for her and Laurel was happy squeeze back. When the family moment had ended and everyone broke away, Emma who had been so calm all night was now wiping tears away, "Come on, we need to head back to the room, people are going to wonder what happened to us." Kristen tried to make a light joke in the heavy moment. Then she checked her makeup in the mirror and headed to the door, ushering Laurel and Sutton out before her yet Emma stood still.

When Kristen looked at her, she didn't know what to do, "I'll stay here." She whispered softly.

Kristen told her other daughters to head back to the room and she closed the bathroom door, "What do you mean you'll stay here?"

"I can't go out there. Sutton's already out there." She said, she shook her head and forced back a tear, "It's fine. I'll just head home and try to get some sleep. I told Sutton to call me tomorrow."

She was just about to walk out the door when Kristen pulled her back in, she took both of Emma's hands in her and looked her daughter in the eyes, "You are family. Do you hear me?" Kristen spoke with kindness and authority.

"But I can't go out there." Emma stifled back tears but a few slipped down her cheek, embarrassed, she looked down at the floor.

"Emma, I need you. Sutton needs you. Laurel needs you. Your father needs you. Don't worry about what anybody else says. Your father was hurt badly tonight. Be there for him." Kristen pulled her daughter into her arms and hugged her.

"Are you sure?" Emma asked as Kristen started to pull the door open.

"Positive" Kristen smiled and then the two walked out of the bathroom together.


	9. Chapter 9

Sutton nervously bit her nail. This habit formed as a child, when she was a child just before a big test. Even though she wasn't as studious as her twin, she still strived to do well in school. At least as a little girl. By the time she got to high school, there were more entertaining things in this world to focus on then getting the best grades in the class. Despite the fact that everyone else was in the room with Ted, she just couldn't pull herself together enough to walk in that room and be strong. She wished she was anywhere else but in his place right now. She wished she had told her dad to stay. Maybe then, that semi wouldn't have crossed three lanes of traffic and smashed into her fathers car. She cursed herself, maybe a little too harshly. Emma who had spotted her sister standing alone outside the room got up and went to her, "You okay?" She asked touching her sisters arm.

Sutton couldn't even look Emma in the eye she just started at some nonexistent object in the distance, and shook her head at Emma's question. She sighed heavily and looked into her sisters eyes, "I shouldn't have let him leave."

"No, Sutton. You can't think like that. Nobody knew that this was going to happen. You can't punish yourself for someone else's mistake." Emma's voice was serious and her eyes locked with Sutton's. Usually Sutton was the emotionally detached of the two. She always held it together no matter how much she was hurting on the outside. This was a side of Sutton that was new to even Emma.

"It's not fair, Em." Sutton looked like she wanted to cry, but her bloodshot eyes looked all cried out, "It's not fair that he's just laying there, dying and there's nothing I can do to make it better. Everything just got so fucked up since you came."

Emma was taken aback by her sisters comment. Pain seared through her blood veins, and sadness washed over her face, "So my coming into your life has just been a giant fuck up? Thanks." With that she stormed down the hallway, unsure of where she was going to go since Sutton had the keys. But she wasn't going back to her sister, to those people. After all, she ruined their perfect lives.

"Emma wait!" Sutton called after Emma but she just kept walking, the tears that had welled in her eyes fell down her cheeks in streams at the sound of her sisters voice fading into the distance, but she refused to go back. After all, it wasn't like Sutton was running after her. She meant what she said, even if she realized in hindsight that it might not have been the best thing to say. She understood her sister was upset but nonetheless, her comment hurt Emma, so now she could share in her sisters pain.

Sutton who had watched her sister fade into the crowd of busy doctors and nurses and nervous families like her own, was now gathering herself enough to go inside Ted's room. It was quiet. Kristen who had always been so strong looked weak and broken down. Mads stood by Thayer, chewing her own nail a habit she must've picked up from Sutton. Alec was on his phone, typing away at an Email or a text message and Laurel was curled on the extra couch asleep, her mom's sweater over her limp body. Sutton walked to Mads who put her hand on Sutton's shoulder, "Where's Emma?" She whispered.

"I may have said something not so nice and she took off." Emma looked at Ted. He just laid there, he looked like he was just sleeping. Tubes were coming out of his mouth assisting him to breathe. Needles were pricked into his wrist and forearm making sure he stayed hydrated. But other than that he looked like her dad. The man who taught her how to ride her bike on two wheel, "Don't let go daddy!" She'd call to him for a fear that if he did she'd get hurt. The man who'd come home after a hard days work and play a game of guess who with her before bed, who would read to her before she'd fall asleep at night. The man who taught her how to drive two years ago and would yell at her for every little thing, "Don't worry dad, she say so calmly from the drivers seat, I've got this." And eventually she did get it. She may not have been the ideal daddy's girl, but he was still her father and it still killed her to see him like this.

"Seriously, Sutton? You have to go find her." Mads said giving her a little push.

"Not now. She knows where we are. She'll come back." Sutton just kept staring.

"No, Sutton. She's not a fucking dog. Whatever you said, you obviously hurt her."

"Obviously."

"So you need to talk to her. This isn't the time to be a bitch, Sutton. He's her father too."

Sighing, Sutton had to agree. She didn't mean what she'd said to Emma but it didn't change the fact that everything had gotten so messed up after she came around. It wasn't safe for the twins to be "out" and she found herself to be in hiding, "Fine. I'll go find her." Then she made her way back out of the room once again.

Emma sat in that empty room, a very strange smell consumed her and she closed her eyes only to be frightened by a loud voice yelling her name, she jumped and turned around. Sutton was rushing up the aisle of empty pews and sat next to her sister, "I'm sorry Em. I didn't mean to say that to you. I didn't mean it like that."

Emma didn't say anything. Instead she closed her eyes again.

"Emma please, I swear I didn't mean it like that."

Emma didn't open her eyes, "Then what did you mean?"

Sutton sat there, quiet for a long moment, "I just meant that everything changed after you got here. For the better and for the worst." She touched her sisters arm "You are the better, Emma. The best. But that doesn't change the fact that things got messed up because of it. I don't know what the hell is such a big secret about us, but whatever it is, Alec will make damn sure we never find out. That's not your fault, Em. I just want my life back. Even though my life has been seventeen years of lies, it was still my life. I want my mom and my dad and Laurel." then she paused.

Emma, whose eyes still hadn't opened but was listening intently to her sisters words, didn't budge.

"And you." Sutton said eventually, "I want you and I don't care if I never see Rebecca again. She let this happen to us. So who cares if she never sees her daughters again. But I'll kill the bastard who tries to take you away from me again."

Emma's eyes finally opened and she sat back on the pew next to her sister, "Thank you." She smiled.

"That's it?" Sutton had planned that whole speech in her mind during her search throughout the entire hospital finding her, "that's all you've got to say?"

Emma nodded, "I'm sorry, what was I supposed to say?"

"I don't know. But I wasn't expecting thank you. Do you at least forgive me?"

"Of course i forgive you. I knew you didn't mean what you said, but it doesn't change the fact that it hurt, Sutton."

"I know." Sutton's voice was soft. Then she looked at Emma, "So what were you doing?"

"Praying. This is a chapel, Sutton."

"Praying to what?"

"To God?" Emma laughed.

"You believe in God?" Sutton had never believed in God. But her parent's still kept God in their home as an option for their kids. Laurel got into it more than Sutton did. She saw religion as a seat belt to living life and that meant more to her than something that may or may not exist.

"Yeah. No matter where I went, how many foster homes I was shifted through, He was always there for me. He was like my best friend. At night I would ask Him to give me a real family and He finally did. He gave me you and Kristen and Ted and Laurel. I was just thanking him for that and asking him to keep Ted safe. We need our dad."

Sutton bit back her tears, "Thank you, Emma." She said hugging her sister. When they stood up, Emma wiped her sisters cheek, the black stain from where her mascara had dried, away. They held hands as they made there way out of the chapel back to their dad's room.


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Sorry this took me some time to post. It's an extremely emotional chapter, so I wanted to capture the emotion right. I didn't want to rush it. Enjoy! As always, thank for reading!**

Emma bit back nerves, her palms were slippery with sweat and her mouth was dry. She knew what she was about to do could be potentially dangerous, but she did it anyways. She raised a shaky fist and knocked loudly against the glass door. She immediately looked to her feet and shuffled them against the sidewalk. When she heard the sound of the lock clicking back into it's place and the door open she looked up, "Emma?" A surprise voice greeted her, "What are you doing here?"

"Hi, mom." She spoke nervously. She didn't know exactly what had prompted her to come over here, but Sutton had been at the hospital every day since Ted's accident.

"Sweetie, come in." Rebecca moved for her daughter to enter, but Emma just stood there, frozen almost as if some kind of supernatural force of wind wasn't allowing her to budge. But then she smiled at her mom as she forced herself into the foyer. Rebecca returned the kind gesture and followed her daughter deeper into the house, "Mads isn't here if you're looking for her? She went with Sutton to see your father."

Emma shook her head, "I'm not here to see Mads." She thought long about her words, she wasn't exactly sure what to say next, "I wanted to see you."

"Ok," Rebecca started, "Well can I get you something to drink? You look thirsty. I just made lavender lemonade."

Even though Emma was thirsty, she didn't feel like sipping lavender lemonade with her mom right now, she had come here with a purpose and she just wanted to get it over with, " No. Mom. Can you just come sit down?"

Rebecca looked at her daughter, seriousness across her face, "Sure, Emma. What's going on baby?" She said when she'd sat next to her daughter on the couch. She wanted to reach out for her daughters hand, she could tell something was weighing heavily on Emma's mind and she was almost happy that she'd come to her to talk about it.

"Why did you come back?" Emma asked nervously avoiding her moms gaze.

"Honey, I came back for you. I came back for Sutton. I wanted my girls." She reached over and touched Emma's hand, who just looked at her mother's pale hand against her tan skin.

"Why now? Where the hell were you for the last 17 years when I needed you most? Where the hell were you when I was a kid and I needed my mom? Do you know how many nights I cried myself to sleep wishing I had a mom who'd come in and comfort me. Do you know how badly I wanted you in my life? How badly I needed you?" Emma forced back tears. The pain of her loneliness still stung deep in her bones.

Rebecca scooped her daughter into her arms, at first Emma's rigid body fought against her mother's gesture, but after a moment she drew in a breath and relaxed for all those nights she'd wished that she was exactly where she is right now, "Emma sweetheart, do you know how shitty it feels to meet your daughter after fourteen years and have her look at you like you're nobody?"

Emma sat up, "What are you talking about?"

"The night I came back. At your birthday party, remember?" Rebecca pushed Emma's tear soaked hair off her cheek. Emma nodded, "You just looked at me like you had no idea who I was and that _killed _me, Emma."

"I didn't know who you were. I mean I got a feeling, but I didn't think it was because you were my mom." Then Emma looked at Rebecca, "Wait, you said fourteen years. Don't you mean seventeen?"

"No. Fourteen." Then Rebecca stood up and left the room, "Where are you going?" Emma chased after her but when Emma caught up to her, she was already coming back holding something in her hands, something that made Emma's heart skip a beat and a breath catch in her throat.

Sutton had been sitting there, so quiet just looking at her dad. Mads stood at her friend's side her hand on her shoulder, "Sutton?" she whispered into the quiet sound of the heart monitor beeping in the background. Sutton looked up at Mads, her face was tired, worn. She's been at the hospital everyday since Ted's accident and she'd barely been able to sleep it had happened, "Why don't we go get something to eat."

"I'm not hungry." Sutton spoke softly, just above a whisper. But Mads knew better. She took Sutton's hand and pulled her to her feet.

"I promise everything is going to be okay." Mad's said. Sutton had to agree, at least long enough for them to get something to eat. As they headed for the door, the soft beeping flattened, Sutton turned at the change in sound. A team of nurses swarmed from behind, surrounding her fathers bed. They were all yelling at each other medical jargon that neither Sutton or Mads could understand.

Then a doctor came up from behind the girls and looked at Sutton, "Miss, I need you to leave." He instructed in a hurry, rushing to the bedside.

Sutton shook her head, "No!" She screamed, "Daddy! Daddy!" She rushed to the bed, breaking her grasp on Mads' hand, only to be pushed back again.

"You need to leave!" the doctor yelled at her again.

Mads rushed to Sutton trying to pull Sutton up from the ground where she'd crumbled too weak to stand on her own two feet, "Sutton, we need to go."

"No!" Sutton screamed again, tears poured down her face and her breathing was heavy.

She was weak, only standing because Mads was fully supporting her weight, "Sutton, we have to go." She instructed.

"Please. No." Sutton begged. Maybe now was the time for her to find God again. She needed her sister, "Where's Emma?"

"I don't know. Let''s go find her." Mads started to pull Sutton out of the room, but Sutton fought her, "Sutton, stop."

Sutton just kept watching the doctors as they rushed around her father all of them talking at once and not a single person stopped to tell Sutton what was going on, "No. I can't go. He needs me!" She reached her arm to her father, only able to catch glimpses of his pale face when a nurse would move or shift her weight, "Daddy! Daddy! It's me. It's Sutton. Please don't leave me!" She cried again, slipping out of Mads' grasp and crashing to the floor, she was heaving now her face was five shades of red and tears poured down her cheeks.

"Ma'am, You really need to leave." then he looked at Mads, "Get her out of here."

Mads just looked at the doctor and back to Sutton, "let's go, Sutton. We need to go. We will go find Emma and everything will be okay."

Sutton looked up at her best friend from the floor, "He's not okay, Mads! He's fucking dying!"

"Sutton, please. We have to go." She had resorted to dragging her across the floor Sutton screaming, protesting. People stared, Mads felt like a mother dragging her screaming child out of a store. But this wasn't her child, this was her best friend.

"Where did you get this?" Emma said, reaching out to touch the soft material in her mothers hands.

"I've kept this tucked away safe for fourteen years. I knew one day I'd see you again." Rebecca said handing her daughter the limp puppy dog doll. Emma's fingers ran over the soft material, memories flooded her suddenly. She closed her eyes, pictures of days at the park with pup pup in hand sliding down the slide because she was too scared to go by herself. Night's in her bed under the star mural and Pup Pup tucked safely under her arms. Today the puppy was an almost faded shade of brown, almost all of his stuffing had disintegrated leaving the once fully stuff Pup Pup limp in her hands. Dirt had smudged across his still smiling face and Emma could swear she could still smell the faint scent of her old home.

"Pup Pup," she whispered cuddling the dog to her cheek like she did as a kid, "I can't believe you kept my stuff dog, mom. But it doesn't answer my question."

Rebecca looked confused, "what question, Emmabear?"

Oh wow, she thought, she hadn't heard that nickname since she was three years old and it made her feel like a kid again, "What happened mom? How did I go from living with you to ending up in foster care."

Rebecca's face bent in a look of pain, like memories of losing Emma were flooding back after fourteen years of suppression. She fought back a tear as she looked at her little girl, and for a moment she remembered that sweet face she'd raised fourteen years ago, "Sweetie, I really want you to know."

"Then tell me, mom." Emma begged.

Rebecca knew her daughter was desperate for answers. Half of her was ready to tell her daughter the dark past she promised to keep there and the other half was terrified to relive the moments that had shaped Emma and herself into the women that sat quietly in Alec's living room. Rebecca took in a breath, "I don't know if you are even ready to know everything yet." Rebecca started to say, but Emma just shook her head.

"I don't care. I don't care how bad it is. Nothing can be worse than foster care. Then not knowing who you are or where you came from." She confirmed.

Rebecca's heart broke listening to her daughter, she knew it wasn't fair, but it was a step up from where she came from she thought, "Are you sure you want to know?" Emma nodded, mentally preparing herself for whatever her mom was about to tell her, Rebecca took in a breath and held Emma's hand, "Well, ok. Baby, just know that what I'm going to tell you is bad. But please hold on to the fact that I did it for you. I did it because I love you." Emma nodded again, already tears prickled her eyes but she remained calm, "When you and your sister were born, I had you separated. I knew that I couldn't take care of both my little girls as much as I wanted to, I couldn't. Alec told Ted he had a daughter named Sutton and he adopted her and raised her. I wanted you so badly that I kept the truth about the twins a secret so I could have you. I knew that if Ted knew about you he would have taken you from me. We lived in Los Angeles until you were three. We lived in a small house just outside of Studio City with my best friend Annie. That's why I changed my name to Rebecca. It was confusing living in a house with two Annies. Do you remember your room? Annie had painted stars above your bed."

Emma nodded, remembering when Sutton and Thayer had discovered the house back in LA, "I remember." Her voice was soft, still clutching her childhood best friend.

"One night after I'd put you to bed, Annie made tea. I guess she left the stove on because a piece of scrap paper caught fire, by the time we figured out what had happened, the fire had begun to spread throughout the house. All I had time to save was you, my innocent baby girl. After that we struggled. Our house was completely burned down." Emma now fought back tears, those dreams where she thought she was drowning that she later realized was from a fire, the images flooded back. Her memory was hazy but as her mother spoke she began to recall memories she didn't even know she had, "I didn't have much money, We'd been struggling even before the fire. As a little girl, I dreamt of being an actress. I moved to LA in hopes of pursuing that dream but with a baby it was difficult. Jobs were few and far between and even though sometimes money was good, it wasn't enough to raise a baby. So after the fire we moved into a hotel room. I couldn't even afford a small apartment." Rebecca broke down at the memory, ashamed that she failed so much as a mother that she couldn't even provide a place for her daughter to live in, "All I wanted was a place for you to grow up in. I wanted you to have a tree house, a swing, a yard to run around in." She spoke through her tears and Emma squeezed her moms hand. Her heart broke for Rebecca. It wasn't like Rebecca wanted to lose her daughter, life just didn't play her the right cards as Sutton would say.

"So what happened, mom?" She too spoke through tears but wiped them away with the back of her free hand.

Rebecca tried calming down and then looked at her daughter, "One night after I couldn't even afford to feed you a real meal, I knew something had to change. This wasn't a life for you, Emma. I wasn't a mother and I held you back, baby. That night after a bath, I put you to bed and tried to figure life out. I didn't have a job and there hadn't been any money flow in months. I had no idea what the future was going to provide us. So that morning, I did something I regret ever since that day. When you woke up I told you that I needed to go away for a while and you asked me where I was going, I told you I wasn't sure but that you were going to spend some time with other little boys and girls your age and you smiled. I knew you didn't understand. You were so innocent, Emma. I couldn't keep hurting you. Every mile I drove hurt, Every step down that hallway was painful because I knew it was one less moment I'd be with you. But I stood with you outside that daycare classroom and I bent down to look you in the eyes and you asked me where I was going and I say that everything was going to be ok. I needed it to be okay, but I knew from that moment forward life would never be okay. It would never be okay because I knew I wasn't coming back. I told you to go in and make new friends but as I walked away I fought back tears when you screamed, 'mommy! Don't go!' I can still hear that little girls voice in my head. You screaming and crying for me to come back. I couldn't even look back without wanting to break down. But I couldn't cause a scene. I broke down in the car, and as I drove away something caught my eye, Pup Pup. I picked him up, he still smelled like you. that soft smell of baby shampoo and that Emma smell. I never let that go, it was all I had left of my daughter."

Emma who's tears were pouring down her cheeks looked at her mom, the memory of that morning flooding back, "I remember that." her voice was shaky, "I remember every single child's mother coming through that door and the joy in the sound of their child's voice when they came to take them home and every time that door opened, I wanted it to be you. I waited for you, mom and you never came. Until every child had left but me. I remember sitting at one of the tables, coloring and asking the teacher where my mommy was. She told me she didn't know but that she'd probably be here soon. But you never came. I remember a woman coming to the day care the next day and told me that I had to go with her. Mom, I was terrified. All I wanted was to see you walk through that door and you never came. You abandoned me, mom." Her words cut through Rebecca like a knife and she cried harder, "My life changed that day mom. I was three years old and you just left me alone in the world." Now her voice was angry, remembering how scared she was, "How could you do this to me?"

Rebecca pulled Emma into her but she just pushed away, "Emma…" Her voice almost a whisper, "Emma, baby, I didn't want to. You have to understand. I did it for you. Because I loved you."

"That's love, mom?" she spat angrily, "That's the farthest thing from love. You could have called Ted. You could have called Alec. You could have done a dozen other things before just leaving me in some random daycare center to fend for myself. I was fucking three years old mom."

Rebecca shook in upset, she wanted to cuddle her daughter just as she had done so many times when Emma was little, "I couldn't call your father. He had no idea you were even alive."

"So instead of facing your lies you let me suffer in foster care?" Emma's head spun, what the hell kind of mother would rather run from her lies than provide her daughter with a better life than foster care.

"I didn't think they'd hand you over like that baby. I don't know. I hoped maybe someone who have taken you in."

"They can't just take me in mom. This isn't some goddamn fairy tale. This is reality and reality is you handed me over to a shitty life of wondering who the hell I was and why my mother didn't love me enough to keep me." She felt her body shake mostly in pain but also in anger.

When Rebecca pulled something from her pocket, Emma looked at it, "You used to carry this in a little purse I made you from an old animal cracker cookie box." She handed Emma a crumpled torn photograph. Emma looked at it, two faces smiled up at her, one of them looked exactly like her, the other, Ted, "You kept this. You would pull it out at night and smile and kiss the picture and say Good night Dada, Good night Utton, you couldn't quite say Sutton. You knew who they were, Emma. You knew you dad and a sister. I never once kept that from you."

Emma remembered the picture. She remembered kissing it at night after her bath when her mom was brushing her hair, "I can't believe I knew about them and you still kept them from me. How could you?"

Rebecca looked at her daughter, "I thought I was giving you a better life, Emma. I really did. I wish you could try and understand how difficult that was. But it doesn't mean I ever stopped loving you. I spent fourteen years looking for you but every time I tried, I got loose ends, dead ends and no answers. I fought for you Emma. I really did. It took me fourteen years to find you and I'm not letting you go."

Emma's brow furrowed, "Well mom, your fourteen years too late. Unlike my three year old self, I can take care of my self now. I don't need a mommy anymore." And with that she grabbed her memorabilia and stormed out of the house slamming the door behind her.

"Well I need my baby." Rebecca whispered knowing Emma couldn't hear her.\

**So now that we know Emma's childhood toy was a stuffed puppy, I wanna know what your childhood toy was, leave a comment telling me what you kept dearly as a child. For me, it was a baby doll that I actually named Baby doll cause I'm so creative. :) One day, I left her at a pizza hut and was beside myself without her. So my mom went back to the pizza hut and they had her. Then I think I lost her somewhere else and she was gone for good. The puppy was my sisters toy so I used that as my inspiration for Emma's toy. **


	11. Chapter 11

That night after Emma had finished brushing her teeth, she went to the kitchen for a cup of tea when something on the back porch caught her eye. Kristen sat alone, a book sat on her lap, "Mom?" she said quietly poking her head out the sliding glass door. Startled, Kristen looked up from her daze, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

"Oh, Emma. It's okay. I was just thinking." She said looking back down again.

Emma moved to sit next to her on the bench, "About anything important?"

Kristen was quiet for a moment and then looked at Emma, her big brown eyes full of love, care, curiosity all aspects of Emma that made her so very different than Sutton, "All I ever wanted was a family." She finally confessed, "two beautiful children. A loving husband."

Emma put her hand on Kristen's, "You have that. You have Sutton and Laurel and Ted."

Kristen nodded at the name of her husband, "Yeah, Ted."

"Ted loves you." Emma said confidently.

"If he loved me, then why did he have an affair? Why did he have to have kids with her when we struggled to have kids of our own?" Then Kristen looked at Emma, a look of horrific realization on her face, "Oh Emma, I'm so sorry."

Emma looked down, "It's ok."

"Are you ok?" Kristen said putting a finger under Emma's chin and lifting her face to meet her own.

Emma just looked at her, not sure of what say. Not sure because she wasn't entirely sure herself and not sure because it had to do with Rebecca and she didn't know if talking to Kristen about it was the best thing, "It's nothing." she said finally.

"Are you sure?"

Emma wavered for a moment, "Yeah, I guess." Then she smiled.

"You guess? Emma, I don't want to intrude on your life, but I do love you. If something is bothering you, you know you can come talk to me, right?"

Emma smiled, "I know, It's just…" She let her voice trail off, "have you seen, Sutton?" She thought maybe talking to her sister about her conversation with her sister would be better than the woman Ted had cheated on when he created her and her sister.

"No, I called her but she didn't answer. She was at the hospital with your dad, but I haven't heard anything else since then. Just let me know if you ever feel like talking." Then she kissed Emma's forehead and started to stand up.

"Wait," Emma was desperate, Kristen turned at the door and looked back at Emma, "There _may _be something on my mind." She sighed. She wasn't sure this was a good idea but she needed to get this off her chest. Kristen sat back down, "I went and saw Rebecca today."

"Okay," Kristen started, her heart beat raced, no matter how much she wanted Emma for her own she knew it would never be possible. Emma would always be Rebecca's daughter along with her own baby, Sutton, "How'd it go?"

Emma shrugged, "I don't know. Not good. I mean, she finally told me everything."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, where I came from. What happened when Sutton and I were born. Part of me is crushed to hear my past, but the other is angry that it happened in the first place."

Kristen took Emma's hand, "Even though it's hard to hear, the good thing is that it's in the past and you're here now."

Emma nodded, "I know. But I've wondered that my whole life. Who I was, where I came from. Who my family was.I just-" She stopped and looked at Kristen, her tear filled eyes met Kristen's baby blues, "I just don't understand why she abandoned me. I'm her daughter, right?"

"Yes, you are. But sweetheart, I don't know why she would abandon you. I can't imagine abandoning my child." Exactly. Emma thought. Why couldn't she have been born Sutton. Why was life so unfair? She wondered. Why did Sutton get the life of luxury, an amazing if maybe a little bit broken family, and she was left at a daycare center to fend for herself? Even if her life would have been awful growing up with her mother, at least she'd have had her mom. Even if she was a bit envious of all the things her sister had, she didn't have Rebecca and for a short while, Emma did.

Emma leaned into Kristen's embrace and rested her head on her shoulder, "I just wished she'd loved me enough to give me a better life."

Kristen kissed the top of Emma's head, "Oh honey, I am sure your mom loves you. But if it helps, I love you more than you will ever know and I will always be here for you and for Laurel and Sutton. You are my girls and I will never turn my back on my girls." Emma smiled, for once she felt at home. In a home with two sisters and a dad. But most importantly, a home in the arms of her mom. Something Rebecca had never provided for her, or at the very least, ripped away from her at a vulnerable age.

"Emma!" Sutton's voice broke through the quiet house that Saturday morning. Emma opened her eyes, the bright sunlight blinding her, "Emma!" Sutton's voice was just a little bit too loud for her comfort right now. She looked at her phone 8:48am. Why, she thought. Then Sutton poked her head in the doorway, "Up, sleepyhead."

Emma rubbed her eyes, "Why?" she groaned, "I was sleeping." Then she looked at Sutton, her hair perfectly made-up, her makeup was fresh and she was already dressed in only the finest young adult clothing. It was obvious Sutton hadn't just gotten up herself, "How long have you been up?"

"An hour, I took a shower, did my hair and makeup. Get up, Laurel's making her famous rainbow pancakes and then we are gonna head out." Sutton pulled at her sister's limp hand yanking her to the ground.

Emma gave her sister a dirty look, "One. Where are we going? And two. What are rainbow pancakes?"

Sutton smiled, "One answer, get up and find out." Then Sutton turned on her heel and head down the hallway, "But hurry up, okay? I don't wanna be late."

Emma took a minute to gather herself, she was tangled in the comforter of her bed in the makeshift room that Kristen had decided would now officially be Emma's. When she stood up, she yawned, threw the blanket on her bed and then headed to her very own bathroom for a shower.

**Sorry this chapter was so short. I have been sick the last two days, so I've been a little out of it. But I hope you enjoyed the Kristen and Emma scene. We needed a sweet mommy moment after that blow up with Rebecca in Chapter 10. As always, thanks for reading! Comment below where you think the girls might be going and what you think rainbow pancakes are (Which are a real thing and they are delicious!)**


	12. Chapter 12

"So she just left you at a daycare center?" Sutton said at the breakfast table. Emma's hair was wrapped in a large towel and she nodded. Laurel brought a plate of rainbow pancakes to the table and sat with her two sisters.

"I can't believe someone could do that." Laurel said picking two pancakes from the stack and passing the plate to Sutton.

"That's pretty fucked up, Em. I'm sorry she did that to you." Sutton said taking two pancakes herself and placing the plate on the table between her and Emma.

Emma looked down at the food, "It's whatever. I don't want to talk about it. So what exactly are rainbow pancakes?" She questioned, switching topics.

"Oh they are pancakes dad taught us to make when Sutton and I were little. They are pancakes with different kinds of fruit. Apple, blueberry, strawberry, and banana. He called them rainbow pancakes cause they have all these different colors swirling in them." Laurel said taking a bite of bacon. Something Sutton passed on.

Emma looked at her plate, "That's sweet." She smiled to herself, she wished she had a father who taught her to cook or how to ride a bicycle or even drive. All of that she learned on her own, "What was it like?" She asked pouring syrup on her pancakes.

"What was what like?" Laurel questioned.

"Living in the same house? Having the same parents. What's it like to have family traditions and memories?" Emma sadness was evident now, but she did her best to stay positive.

Sutton and Laurel looked at each other. In hindsight, they always thought that some of the traditions their family had were stupid, but for Emma, who had never experienced a family, it looked less stupid, "I don't know. I mean, it was nice." Sutton started to say. Then all of a sudden the conversation spun into a trip down memory lane, "Oh my gosh, do you remember when we went skiing down the mountain in Boulder and you hit the tree?" Sutton teased her little sister.

Laurel laughed at the memory, "It's funny now. but I was mortified for a month. Oh! And remember the hot skier we spied on? What did we name him? Oh yeah, Bobby."

"Bobby! God he was hot!" Sutton laughed at the memory of their family trip to Boulder, Colorado two years ago. It was one of the first times that Laurel and Sutton had only each other to hang out with. Emma smiled, clearly absent from that trip she listened anyways, her heart sank listening to them talk. She knew no matter what she would never have those kinds of memories with, well, anyone. The only sibling she had growing up was Travis and he was the farthest thing from the trophy "foster brother."

"So what happened with dad?" Emma asked after the laughter had died down. Sutton didn't even look at her sister.

"Mom told me he had a heart attack while you were there, Sutton. Is that true?" Laurel looked at her older sister. Sutton closed her eyes and nodded slowly, the images of her father the other day still so fresh in her memory, "But, he's fine now, right, Sutton?"

Sutton looked up, annoyed, "I don't know. Laurel. I didn't exactly get to stay and no one really filled me on what the fuck was going on. Instead I was dragged out of his room by Mads. Now can we please talk about something else. Oh I know. How about we talk about Emma."

Emma gave her sister a look, "What about Emma?"

"How are things with Ethan?" The topic was still hard for Sutton to swallow, but she knew that what she'd done was for the better.

Emma blushed, "I don't know. I haven't had a chance to talk to him since we've been home. I was supposed to go to dinner with him, but apparently we are going somewhere that I didn't even know we were going." Sutton and Laurel looked at each other a smile across their faces. A silent agreement.

"Don't worry," Laurel said picking up the empty plates from the table and walking them to the sink. When the girls had finished cleaning from breakfast, they all piled into Laurel's Acura SUV, "It has the most space." Laurel said when Emma asked why Sutton was letting her sister drive.

The girls drove listening to a playlist of pop music that Laurel had in a series of different playlists on her iPhone, "Who is this?" Emma asked, none of this music sounded familiar to her.

"The Stunners?" Laurel said with a smile, "I saw them a few years back when they opened for Justin Bieber."

Emma almost choked on her diet Coke, "You went to see Justin Bieber in Concert?" She tried to retain her laughter.

Laurel's brow furrowed, "I was like 13, ok? And For the record, I don't really listen to him anymore." She said pulling onto the highway.

Emma nodded, "I guess we all had our embarrassing musical tastes in our preteens days, I will admit that I was totally into The Jonas Brothers." She blushed in embarrassment.

Sutton turned from the passengers seat, "I was SO in love with Joe! I wanted to marry him when I was like 14."

Emma looked at her twin, twin sense again or maybe because Joe was the most popular brother, "Haha, I would have killed you for him!" The girls burst into a fit of laughter and the song changed to another Stunners song. After a long while of driving in silence, Emma spoke again, " So will you please tell me where we are going?"

Sutton looked back at Emma, "You and your lack of adventure. It's New Mexico all over again. Well, if you must know, Mom has decided to give you that back room. We are going to take you to decorate it. You know, get new bedding, some wall decorations, curtains. I love this interior decorator stuff." Sutton confessed.

Emma's heart melted, she never had a room of her own and if she did, it was never one she got to decorate herself. Old hand-me-down blankets, flattened pillows, mismatched decorations on the wall none of which screamed Emma Becker. This was the first time she could have her own space. Somewhere that she made all her own and it meant the world to her that Kristen cared about her enough to make her part of the Mercer family.

**A/N: So for those of you who don't know, The Stunners was the band that Allie Gonino was in before she was on TLG! I thought it'd be funny for Laurel to have been a fan of their music. Plus, I can see Laurel having been into the pop music in her younger years. What music are you guys listening to? Leave me a comment and let me know! I love looking up new music. :)**


	13. Chapter 13

As the girls were putting the last finishing touches on Emma's new room, a loud commotion from the living room caught their attention. Emma, who had chosen a worldly vintage theme for her room, put down the paint brush she was holding and walked down the hall, "What's going on?" Laurel asked following her but Emma just put a finger to lips, she pressed her back to the wall and tried to quiet her breathing.

"I don't care!" A woman's voice echoed in the living room, "She's my daughter!"

"What is Rebecca doing here?" Laurel whispered but Emma just pressed her finger to her lips again.

"You can't just waltz in here after 14 years and take what you think is your's just because you had her for a few years! Who the hell do you think you are?" Kristen's voice was livid. Emma's heart beat faster, but she remained calm, they were fighting about her.

"I think I'm everything you're not! I think I'm her mother and you never will be. Fact is you will never be Sutton's mother. You can take the man, but what you can never take from me are those girls. You will never be their mom."

Rebecca's cold words stung Kristen. She knew she was right, but she loved Emma and Sutton like her own, "You may have given those girls their lives, but you will never _be _a mom." Kristen's voice was low now, almost a whisper, anger surged through their words.

Rebecca bit back tears, "I tried so hard with Emma. She was my whole world. I messed up and all I want is my baby back." She held one of the only photo's she had of her daughter her fingers crumpling it in her hands. A tear fell down her cheek and splashed on Emma's smiling toddler face. Rebecca's words came out in a plea.

Kristen threw her hands in the air, "What I don't understand is how you could have just dumped your child at a day care center and assume that she was going to be alright? You're lucky she is still alive."

Rebecca closed her eyes, knowing all too well how lucky Emma was to be alive, "You have no idea." She whispered the response.

"Excuse me?" Kristen looked at the other woman sitting on her couch, red-faced and crying.

Rebecca looked up at her, "I said, you have no idea how lucky Emma is." Emma, who had been listening with Laurel and Sutton from the hallway, put her hand on her sisters arm, "You remember in high school how I went through periods of depression?" Kristen nodded, remembering the scares she'd given Phyllis when she'd threatened to kill herself after another bad breakup or when she'd catch Rebecca cutting herself in the school bathroom after another failed test. After time, Phyllis begged her mom to get Rebecca some help and it was then that she was diagnosed with being bipolar. Soon after, she was put on medication and she tried getting her life together, "Well when I found out I was pregnant, I stopped taking my medication for the safety of my babies. After they were born, I forgot to take them regularly. I missed a few and after the fire, after days of wondering how I was going to feed my child, I just couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't keep Emma no matter how badly I wanted her." She sank lower into the couch and realized what she was saying, her face pinched more emotional than before a feeling of complete shame and fear over took her, "So one night after she'd gone to sleep, I realized I had two options. I could give Emma up or I could kill her. In my breakdown, I looked at her sleeping so sweet, she was so precious and put my hands on her neck and I just started squeezing. I watched her little face go pale until her eyes opened and her little arm reached up, I realized what I was doing and I let go. I was watching my daughter die under my own hand. I didn't think I could do something so terrible. All I wanted was to love her. I wanted her to have a good life, a home, a place to grow up. I missed playing with her hair, dressing her up. A daughter was all I ever, wanted. You know that feeling, right?" As Emma heard this her heart sank, fingernails digging into Sutton's arm, holding herself up.

Kristen nodded, "I understand, I really do. But, I just can't let you take her. I love her and she deserves a good home. You've done enough damage. Now, please, I need to start dinner. You to leave." Kristen's voice was shaky. She couldn't take in everything that Rebecca had just confessed to her. Even in her darkest of times and her lowest of lows, never once did the idea of killing Sutton no matter how badly she wanted to give her back, ever cross her mind. She ushered Rebecca to the door.

Emma felt herself falling to the floor, it had seemed like the ability to stand was no longer an option. Nobody said a word. Laurel shook her head, her arm on Emma's shoulder. Sutton, who was supplying Emma her main support wrapped her arms around her sister. She looked at her with wide eyes, "Emma, I-" she wanted to say something, anything but nothing seemed to justify Rebecca's actions. Emma shook her head. Her mind drew a memory, hazy, but clear enough to make out what it was. She was in that hotel room. She remembered it being small, the few belongings, she and her mom had left after the fire was strewn around the room. Stuffed dolls and toys, Rebecca had salvaged from friends around town accompanied the young girl in her bed. Flashes of her mom brushing her hair popped in her mind. Her mom singing her her favorite lullaby to soothe her to sleep. Then it hit her, the memory so strong she felt it in her physical body. She felt like she wasn't breathing. Her arm reached for her sister, "Emma?" her sisters worried voice was faded in her memory, her eyes looked disconnected. Sutton looked at Laurel, "Go get mom!" She ordered. Laurel stood up and headed down the hallway, "Emma? Emma, can you hear me?" She could hear her sister yelling at her but she sounded distant despite the fact she was sitting beside her. Her memory consumed her. She remembered falling asleep to her mothers voice, hands running through her semi-wet hair, "Emma sweet heart." It was Kristen's voice this time, distant as if she was with Sutton down the hall of the hotel, "I need to say something." She said. But she couldn't. She was constrained to the bed, the feeling of someone's hands around her neck choking her. She wanted to scream. She needed Kristen to find her, know she was in trouble. She reached her arms up, the ability to breathe became increasingly difficult. Her face went pale and Kristen started to shake her, "Emma!" She was screaming at her now, hoping to wake her from this memory, but Emma was so consumed by the memory she didn't recognize Kristen's gestures. All she knew was that she couldn't breathe. She tried fighting her restraint but it seemed nearly impossible to move let alone fight back. Kristen looked at her two daughter's who looked worried, "What happened?" At first no one answered, Laurel and Sutton exchanged silent glances as if to agree that they wouldn't admit to having eavesdropped on her conversation with Rebecca, "What happened!" She was demanding now shooting angry glances at her daughters.

Both girls avoided her glances, but it was Laurel who spoke up first, "She overheard the conversation with Rebecca." Sutton shot Laurel a look as if to say 'we agreed' but Laurel just looked at Emma who's distant look of horror frightened her.

"She heard the whole conversation?"

"Every last detail." Laurel confirmed.

"She must have relapsed into the memory." Kristen turned back to Emma now, "Emma, honey. I need to know if you can hear me. If you can hear my voice can you tap my hand?" She put her hand next to Emma's limp fingers. Emma tried hard to get Kristen's attention. Her vision began to fade, white eluded her and she fought it. Her fingers were numb but she managed to budge them just enough to brush against Kristen's hand, it was the best she could do to let her know she could hear her. Help me, she thought. Kristen looked down at the feeling of Emma's movement, "She hears us." Kristen smiled. "Emma, I need you to look at me." Emma tried to find her but she was nowhere. Suddenly she heard a loud noise, a bad word and she was able to breathe again, she gasped and coughed a few times her eyes searched for Kristen, when she caught her gaze she smiled, she crashed into Kristen's arms where she felt safe, "Emma, what happened?"

Emma was panting catching her breath, "I don't know. I just couldn't breathe." She spoke softly.

"Did you hear the conversation with Rebecca just now?" Emma nodded guilty. She moved into Kristen's embrace and relaxed in the safety of her arms, "I'm not going to let her hurt you, Emma." She kissed the top of her daughter's head. Emma wanted to thank her. She didn't have to accept her for anything. It wasn't her burden to raise her but she was thankful she did. For once, Emma felt a part of a home and a part of a family. She finally felt welcome in her home.

She looked at Kristen, "I don't want to see her again." She whispered.

Sutton who was now sitting next to her twin, her hand on her back, looked at her, "Emma, she's our mom."

Emma sat up, finally breathing normally, "I don't care, Sutton. She tried to kill me and I just relived that moment. If I never see her again in my life, I will be happy. I have a mom, you have have a mom and she will never be Rebecca. You don't know what it was like to feel like you couldn't breathe and there was nothing you could do. You were lucky, Sutton. So why do you have to take this for granted?" Sutton just looked at her sister who looked at her with anger in her eyes, "What the hell is it about this family that you hate so much? You got _everything _and nothing is good enough for you. You have no idea what shit I went through growing up and you actually _want _a relationship with Rebecca? You know what? Fine. You can have mom. I'm home. I'm home here, with Kristen and Laurel and Ted. If this isn't good for you, Sutton, then maybe you should go back to Vegas, go be a foster kid for a while and realize how fucking good you _really _have it." She spat. Her anger overtook her. She couldn't seem to understand why someone who had someone who loved, cared and gave her daughters everything they could ever want or need would take that for granted.

Sutton looked at Emma, she was never one to back down from an argument, "News flash, _Emma, _But I did live your life, remember?"

"Oh what, you spent a day with Lexi and then played some poker to make some cash to get back here? Yeah, sounds really fucking terrible Sutton. You can have Rebecca. I know how badly you want your real mother. Since Kristen isn't good enough for you, I will take her. She's best damn thing I've ever had as far as a mother is concerned. So go on and go be with Rebecca. You seem to be more like her than I was." Emma brushed a tear from her cheek and stood up, "I'm done." She declared and went to her room, slamming the door behind her.


	14. Chapter 14

**Author's note: Prepare yourselves people! There's a HUGE shock at the end of this chapter... Be forewarned now. ;) Thanks as always for reading!**

"Daddy!" Sutton was beaming when she entered that hospital room later that night. They rushed over after dinner when Kristen got the call that Ted had finally come out of his coma. She rushed to his bedside.

"Hi, baby." He said with a tired smile. He wrapped his arms around his daughter and looked up, catching Emma's gaze, "Emma." His voice was soft. He opened his arm as to invite her in but she just smiled, "Come here." He said. She smiled and made her way to his bedside and leaned into his embrace. She hadn't spoken to Sutton since her blow up that afternoon, now that she thought of it, she hadn't said much to anyone since her blow up. It wasn't because she was mad at anyone specifically, she had just been taking everything in since her episode in the hallway. She wanted to know how Rebecca could even _think _about killing her baby let alone actually _attempt _it? All she knew was that she hated her mom. When her phone buzzed in her back pocket, she broke from the embrace and pulled it out to see who it was. A new text message her notification informed her, she looked to see who it was from: Lexi. She slid the icon and opened her texts, _Hey lollypop! I've been thinking about you. How's the family thing going? Txt me, I miss you. _Emma smiled. She missed her best friend like crazy. Even if her life in Vegas was overall shitty, she had one shining light in it all and that was Lexi. She began to type, _crazy, shitty, amazing. Too much too even think about right now. How are you? I've missed you too._ Then she slid the phone into her back pocket and looked up at her family. They all seemed so consumed in talking that it was almost like they'd forgotten Emma was in the room. She wondered if they'd even notice her if she left. Her phone buzzed again, _tell me EVERYTHING. Why so shitty little bird?_

She felt a tear well in her eye, she could definitely use her best friend right now, even though she had Sutton, it wasn't the same. Lexi knew everything about Emma. All of Emma's stupidest decisions happened with Lexi. Every bad fashion choice. Every crush. Every boyfriend turned ex. Sutton wasn't there when Josh, the school's class president broke Emma's heart in front of the whole school when he declared that she wasn't pretty enough for him and that he was seeing Carly the head cheerleader. Sutton wasn't there to eat almost an entire gallon of mint chocolate chip ice cream in bed while watching almost every episode of Friends in marathon while Emma cried and wondered why boys were such assholes. Lexi calling her _Little Bird_ her old nickname from camp, made her think of days of face paint and super soaker fights in the woods at dusk. Her fingers hovered over the keyboard she wanted to tell Lex everything. But it was too much for Emma to relive, so she settled, _It's just not as amazing as I was hoping to be. What's new over on the home front? _

_Travis got arrested again. Looks like Clarice realized you weren't the one stealing all her money. I'm sorry Little B. Come home? _Emma looked at the last two words, her heart longed for her best friend but Vegas wasn't home. Hell, Phoenix was barely home. She almost couldn't wait to turn eighteen. Maybe then she could get as far away from the west coast as she could. In the little free time she had to herself, Emma had started looking into colleges. She'd always dreamt of one day walking the halls of an ivy league school in New England but she knew no foster family could afford a school of such calibre. Now that she'd made a space for herself in the Mercer family she began to dream once again. She didn't expect Ted and Kristen to front her $50,000 a year to go to Harvard or Yale. They already had to pay for Sutton's schooling. Not that Sutton would take it as seriously as she would. She'd probably worry more about the next frat party than the grades she made.

_Figures. That little bastard had that shit coming for him. I wish Honey Badger, but I can't. Even if I wanted to, I have no money to get a ticket back. Come here? I could really use you. _She watched as a tear splashed on the screen of her iPhone and her message send. She looked again at the Mercer's. No matter how hard she tried she would never be a part of that family. She'd only been in Phoenix a few months. She couldn't relate to their stories of family vacations or holiday memories. But when Sutton joined her on the couch and put her arm around her, she knew that she'd come to Phoenix with a purpose and that purpose was to get to know her sister, "Why the tears, Em?" Her twin asked her resting her head on her sisters shoulder.

Emma shook her head, "Just missing my life in Vegas."

Sutton looked up at her, "I thought you didn't have a life in Vegas. That's why you came here?"

"No, I didn't come here to get away from Vegas. It was a plus at the time, but I came here for you Sutton." She wrapped her arm around Sutton and pulled her into a hug, "I just miss my best friend."

Sutton hugged her sister, she tried to empathize with Emma, after all, it'd been months since she'd heard from Char and quite frankly she missed her like crazy, "I'm sorry, Em. At least you have me." She smiled.

Emma smiled too. She really was thankful to have Sutton, "I know that. I love you, Sutton. Thank you for finding me."

"Of course. I just wish I found you sooner." The twins hugged tighter when someone cleared their throat. The girls pulled away and looked up, Emma's heart skipped a be at for a quick second. But then she gathered herself and stood up.

"I am gonna go." She declared and without another word, she headed out the door, eyeing Rebecca who'd just walked in on the way out.

"Emma!" Rebecca called from the doorway watching her daughter disappear down the hall but Emma didn't turn around and she would never, ever, if it killed her look that woman in the eyes ever again. Sutton followed suit rushing after her sister, When Rebecca caught her by the forearm she looked at her birth mother, "Where are you going baby girl?"

Sutton ripped her arm from Rebecca's grip, "To find the best thing you ever gave me and the worst thing you ever took from me." Then she headed out the door.

Sutton found Emma sitting alone in the cafeteria, a cup of chocolate pudding half eaten sat in front of her, she wasn't paying attention to anything and just stared off into the distance, "Care to share?" She asked sitting at the table.

Emma looked at Sutton, "Get your own." She joked. Sutton made a pouty face, but Emma handed her the extra spoon the lady at the register handed her without realizing she'd gotten her own. Sutton took a spoonful, "So how about the academy award winning exit you just made? That was pretty epic."

"I told you, I want nothing to do with her. If you came here to talk to me about Rebecca then you can leave." She said twisting the spoon her mouth.

Sutton took the warning, "I didn't. I just came here to be with you. Hey, I got this mad libs app on my phone the other day. Laurel and I used to do these on long car rides when we were little."

"Really? Lexi and I used to do them all the time." The more time the girls spent together the more they realized how similar they were and how different they were. They realized their favorite ice cream was mint chocolate chip and Phish Food from Ben and Jerry's. The same Saw movies scared them when they were younger and they even loved the same rides at Disneyland.

Sutton pulled out her phone and opened the app. The girls had gotten so consumed in the games that they didn't realize how much time they'd spent talking, laughing, sharing stories. After so many mad libs they started a new game of 20 questions, "Does it live in the wild?" Emma asked. Sutton shook her head.

Emma was about to ask another question when a woman's voice startled them, "There you are!" Kristen was standing at the entrance to the cafeteria, Laurel behind her, "We have been looking everywhere for you. Come on, we are gonna head home. Visitation hours are over and you girls have school in the morning."

The twins stood up and picked up their trash that by now had grown to another empty cup of pudding, two bottles of diet Coke and a bag of skittles. They headed out of the hospital still consumed in their game of 20 questions.

"Why didn't you tell me about Emma, Rebecca?" Ted questioned. It was all he wanted to know since he found out about his twin daughters. He was sitting up in his hospital bed, the soft beep of the heart monitor sounded behind him.

Rebecca took his hand and he looked down but didn't pull away, "I wanted to, Ted. But I knew if I did, you'd take her from me." She looked away, "You knew I couldn't take care of two girls. So when I found out I was having twins, I thought if I only told you had one, you'd insist on taking her. All I wanted was a daughter, so I lied to you. I kept Emma and gave you Sutton. I'm sorry." Her fingers intertwined with Ted's, still he didn't pull away.

He looked up at her, "So what happened, Rebecca?" Rebecca looked at him. She'd relived her horrific too many times already that she wasn't sure if she was wanted to go through this again. But she drew in a breath and told him everything, the fire, living in poverty, how horrible she felt for dragging Emma down with her when she was so innocent. She told him how she tried killing her daughter and essentially dumping her in a day care center when she was 3 years old.

When she was done, Ted just looked at her, "You tried to kill our daughter?" His words were a mere whisper taken aback by her story, "You should have called me."

"You don't know how much I couldn't do that." She said. Ted looked at this woman.

"But dumping her at a day care was a better idea? She is my daughter, Rebecca. I would have raised her in a heartbeat if you had just called me." He wanted to yell at her but he just couldn't muster the energy to barely speak above a whisper.

Rebecca's guilty face just looked at him, "I know that. But I was sick, Ted. You know that. I never should have had Emma. But all I wanted was my baby. After 9 months with them, feeling them move and kick, after all of that, I wanted my baby so badly. I couldn't just give them up." She looked down allowing her tears to fall down her face.

"But it was easy to give up, Sutton?"

"No!" She looked up at him, her voice was soft but powerful, "But i gave her to you. I knew she'd have a good home and a family. She would be safe there."

"And so what? You were so selfish that you couldn't give Emma the same life?" Now he pulled his away from her and she just looked at him, her eyes pleaded with him to understand her. The more she talked about her past, the more she hated herself for the things she thought at the time were in the best interest of her daughter. In hindsight, she easily could have called Alec or Ted and said she couldn't raise this child and even if Ted would be mad for lying to her, at least he would have taken her and she never would have to see him again. But back then, in her time of illness, that was the worst thing she could have done. She couldn't face Ted after all she'd done, "Have you told the girls the other news?"

Rebecca looked at Ted, "No, we promised never to speak of that ever again."

"We promised a lot of things. But it seems that every secret, every lie we buried 17 years ago is starting to surface now. Maybe it's time we tell the girls about Thayer."

Rebecca nodded, "They need to know he's their brother, i know that, but right now isn't the right time. When everything calms down with the twins, we will tell them." The Ted slipped his hand in hers and pressed her fingers to his lips.

"We will get our family back." He said before closing his eyes again, allowing sleep to consume him.


	15. Chapter 15

Emma hadn't slept much the last few days since she'd overheard the conversation in the living room between Kristen and Rebecca. More than once she'd awaken to terrible nightmare's, flashbacks of her childhood. Her mother's smiling face as she'd push her on the swing, chase her around the open field behind her house before the fire. She remembered being rocked to sleep in the comfort of her room, her moms arms wrapped protectively around her little body, "I love you sweetheart." her mothers voice so soft as she'd drift off to sleep. "Back to your old ways, Mrs. Mercer." A male voice scared her out of her trance and she looked at the paper her handed her.

"Sorry." She said, a mere whisper taking the paper, a 75% in black ink on the cover page made her heart sink. She couldn't remember the last time she'd received anything lower than a 90 on a paper before. But lately, school had take a back burner to all of the other things occupying her time these days. Even though the twins had been out to their family and friends, Emma still posed as Sutton in school or as Sutton insisted, "You're so much smarter than I am." She decided it wasn't best to have to suffer whatever the consequence the school would dish out if they knew about the switch. She didn't want this grade to bring her down any more than she already was. She shoved the paper in her notebook as the bell rang and she headed to her car. She agreed to meet with Sutton and Laurel after school to spend the afternoon with Ted. He had still been in the hospital after his heart attack and even though Kristen stayed with him in the mornings, the girls would relieve her so she could go home, make dinner and maintain the household.

Laurel was already standing outside her classroom when Emma pushed the door open, "Hey!" Laurel pushed herself off the wall making Emma jump.

"God, don't give me a heart attack." She said pressing a hand to her chest.

"Sorry." Laurel laughed, "So guess what?"

"Hmm?" Emma switched the notebook she was holding to her other arm and pulled her keys from her large tote bag.

"I got asked to prom." She was nearly jumping out of her skin.

Emma looked at her, "Who?! Tell me everything!" She wanted to jump with her sister, decided it may have looked a little silly to be jumping up and down in the hallway of the school.

"Ryan Michaelson. he just came up to me at lunch and asked me. We worked on our science project together last semester in chem lab and we got pretty close. But then he started talking Sadie Collins and I swore he was going to ask her." Laurel had a tendency to talk endlessly sometimes to the point where people quit listening half way through her speeches, "So when he came up and asked me, I nearly freaked out!" Laurel looked at her.

"Sweet Laurel! I am so happy for you!" In the near distance, she heard her car beep and headed towards the sound.

"Are you okay?" Suddenly Laurel's ecstatic demeanor changed to one of concern.

Emma nodded slightly, "Yeah, just tired." And I got a 75 on what should have been an A paper she wanted to add but didn't. She pressed the button on her key to pop the trunk of her car and dropped her bag in with Laurels.

"That's all?" Laurel asked as she climbed into the passengers side of the silver BMW.

Emma put the key in the ignition and looked at her sister, "Yes. I didn't sleep well last night. Now quit asking."

Laurel just nodded and them focused all of her attention ahead as they drove to the hospital.

Kristen was just finishing an article in one of Ted's medical journals, a bunch of jargon she didn't even understand, when the girls came in, "Oh Girls, how are you?" She greeted putting the magazine on the roll away table with Ted's half eaten lunch. Hospital food was never something to be raved about. Laurel, Emma and Sutton put their bags on the extra couch and each gave their father a hug. He had been looking much better since they last saw him. The color in his cheeks had fully restored and he was more chatty now, less sleepy.

The girls updated Kristen and Ted on school and after Laurel went off for about 20 minutes on Ryan's prom proposal, Kristen looked at Emma, "Are you okay sweetie?"

Emma looked at her, "Why is everybody asking me that? I'm fine. Just tired."

Kristen just looked at her daughter, "Ok sweetheart, but if you need to talk, I am here."

But Emma just looked at her mothers hurt face. She didn't mean to snap, but she really hadn't been feeling her best since Rebecca admitted to almost murdering her as a baby. It wasn't a lie when she said she was tired. She had laid in bed waiting for sleep to over take her, but when she would close her eyes she could see it all again. The feeling of not being able to breathe, her moms hands wrapped around her neck. She hadn't slept through the night in almost a week and she was beginning to feel it's toll kicking in, "I'm sorry mom. I didn't mean to snap, I just really am tired."

"It's okay baby." She gave her a kiss on her forehead, "I'm gonna head home. Call me when you hit the road okay?"

The girls nodded and said their good-byes. When she was gone, Sutton pulled out a deck of cards, "Okay, this time loser has to buy the winner her prom dress."

"deal." They all agreed and Sutton dealt the girls their cards. They played three rounds and were laughing with Ted when a nurse poked her head in the room.

"fifteen minutes left for visitation." She smiled. Harrieta had been Ted's nurse on duty every afternoon the girls came by and they became very close with her. Most of the time she'd let the girls stay a few minutes past visitation hours and kept it their secret. But tonight the big boss was making his rounds so Harietta cracked the whip and made sure the girls left on time tonight. They got in one more round of poker before kissing their father and leaving for the night.

"Emma," Ted said as she was heading out the door.

She stopped short and turned around, "Yes, daddy?"

"Tomorrow, just you and me? You're going down." Ted had always taught Laurel and Sutton how to play poker since they were little girls. It was his way of father-daughter-daughter bonding. Even though she was old enough to know how to play the game, he still wanted those same memories he made with Laurel and Sutton when they were little girls, with his new long lost daughter.

She smiled, "I don't know. I'm getting better. Maybe it will be _you _who goes down."

Ted laughed, "In your dreams baby girl. See you tomorrow. I love you."

Emma blew her father a kiss, and headed down the hall to meet with her sisters.

**Authors note: I'm SO sorry it took me so long to update. I have been busy this past week. Also sorry that this chapter is uneventful. Don't worry things are gonna pick up. I suggest buying tissues now. :) As always thanks for reading! Leave a comment and let me know what your family bonding rituals were if you had any. We always went on family car rides to get ice cream and we would go to the local park and feed birds french fries. :)**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: I am SOOOOOO so sorry that i have been away for so long. I had a crazy few months and forgot about this. But I'm back now. I will try and post regularly again now that things have slowed down. :) Hope you guys enjoy!**

"That blue is stunning!" Laurel cooed as Emma twirled around barefoot in her dressing room. She had spent the afternoon with Sutton, Laurel and Mads picking out dresses for prom. Even though he hadn't yet, Emma secretly hoped Ethan would ask her to be his date for the prom that was being held at the end of the month.

"Em, that dress is gorgeous! I think you found a winner." Mads said running her hand over the blush blue chiffon floor length dress. Emma turned to profile, looking at reflection in the mirror. She remembered back to Vegas and all the conversations she'd had with her best friend Lexi about prom. Even though back then, she'd joked about how prom was only for popular cheerleaders and sex craved couples, she secretly wished someone would notice her long enough to even consider asking her to be their date. Her face twisted as she ran a hand down her flat stomach.

"Can someone say Hollywood?!" Sutton said pushing the curtain aside to reveal an ombred sunburst dress that made her golden brown skin look freshly kissed by the sun. The strapless bodice was encrested with diamonds, that descended down the skirt, "Emma, that dress is stunning." Sutton said standing beside her twin in the triple mirror. Both girls looked gorgeous in their dresses. But Emma sighed.

"Your dress is way better." She said pulling on the dress that draped her body.

"Em, you look stunning. With some soft curls and sparkly makeup? You are going to stop hearts." Sutton said looking at her sister, "Seriously, you should get it."

"You think so?" Emma looked back at the girl in the mirror. The blush blue dress popped against her tanned skin. Like her twins, it was straspless, bands of blue and silver diamonds wrapped her torso like belts that were joined by a big blush blue flower just off to the side of the dress.

"Get it, Em. You look amazing. What do you think of this?" She did a twirl, the flowy skirt twisting around her ankles.

"I love it Sutton. You look amazing." She smiled looking at the dress on her sister. Secretly wished she'd spot it first. But from the very first moment Sutton saw it in the display of Henry's Bridal and Prom dress shop, she had "dibs."

She stepped back into her dressing room to change back into her regular clothes. She slipped off the dress and looked at the price tag, $2,500. Her heart nearly stopped. Never had Emma ever dreamt of spending two and a half grand on a dress she'd wear once. She put it back on the hanger and put her clothes back on.

When she stepped out of the dressing room she met up with her sisters and Mads. All three held their respective dresses. Sutton looked at her, "Where's the dress?" Emma's heart skipped a beat. She really did love the dress, but she couldn't imagine spending that much of her dad's money, especially since the accident and the hospital bills.

"I don't know if I'm gonna get it." She said putting her thumb nail in her mouth and immediately began chewing.

"What do you mean?" Sutton looked at her sister, "You looked incredible. I thought you wanted it."

"I did, but Ethan hasn't even asked me and it was a lot of money." Emma looked at her shoes, a pair of coach sneakers she'd bought on one of her shopping trips with her sisters.

"Emma, seriously?" Sutton smiled even though it killed her still to think Ethan was eventually going to ask Emma, especially since she was going to force him into it, "He is going to ask you and don't worry about it. I've got the credit card to make all dreams come true." Sutton put her dress on the counter and then looked up at the woman standing at the register, "hold on, we have one more dress too." While Mads and Laurel paid for their dresses, Sutton took Emma back to the dressing room, "What is wrong, Emma?" She said when they were all alone.

"Nothing, it's a lot of money and dad is paying for it. Don't you think he has enough to pay for with the hospital bills?"

Sutton grabbed the dress off the hook in the empty dressing room that Emma had occupied just moments earlier, "You know that dad gets free health care because he works at the hospital, right?"

Emma didn't know that. She shook her head. Still her stomach churned at the idea that her sisters were about to spend almost $6,000 of their fathers money on three dresses that they would only wear once and that was before shoes. Emma sighed, "Fine Sutton, get it. If it makes you that happy."

Sutton smiled, "It does. And lighten up a little sissy. I am not as careless with my money as you think I am."

"I didn't say you were careless." Emma sighed, "I've just never had two thousand dollars to spend on anything let alone a dress that I'm only wearing for a few hours on one night."

"But for those few hours you are going to look like a celebrity and you're going to be a star." Sutton took her sisters hand and gave it a squeeze. Emma smiled. Half of her missed the simple life of thrift shops and consignment shops. But then again, she loved the dress and she could definitely get used to the high life her twin sister had introduced her to.

After the girls payed, they climbed into Mad's BMW. They headed back out towards a small boutique that only sold high end designer shoes. It was Sutton's favorite place. They even had her credit card on file. But not before detouring through a starbucks for a late afternoon pick me up.

Inside the store, Emma spotted them right off the bat, her eyes lit up at the sparkle and she lifted the model off the rack, immediately a small woman in an all black business suit approached her, "What size can I get for you?" her voice made Emma jump almost dropping the glass shoe.

"Oh um, a 7 please?" As the woman walked away with a nod, she took a seat at a nearby bench, she flipped the shoe over. No price. Figures, she thought. If you have to ask you can't afford it. Sutton joined her, holding a strappy heel in her hands, "That is beautiful. The diamonds are going to match your dress perfectly. What do you think of these?" She held up the platinum Miu Miu heel that she'd sent another store clerk to fetch in the same size as Emma.

Emma's face twisted, "They are very... Shiny." She said for lack of another word.

"Aren't they going to look amazing with my dress?" Emma looked at them again as the lady came back with her shoes.

"They might. I have to see them on." Them she slipped on her own shoes and stood up. The height of the stiletto heel made her wobble some but Sutton pressed a hand to her sisters back helping her stabalize. Emma looked at the shoes in the mirror. The all glass shoes were showed her whole foot, a sparkle of diamonds on the straps glimmered in the bright lights that framed the mirror she stoof in front of. She smiled, she loved them.

"Those are amazing." Mads said standing behind Emma.

Emma popped a foot up and looked at them, "They are." Then she looked at the sales lady, "How much are these?" even though she knew the answer was not going to be $50 which is all she'd ever consider spending on a pair of shoes, but she asked anyways.

"18 hundred 56." the woman replied. Emma swallowed hard.

Sutton spoke up, "She'll take 'em." Emma shook her head but handed the shoes to the sales lady anyways. She sat down next to her sister again, "live it up sister, you only get prom once."

****Emma tried to relax, but she knew that this was the most she'd ever spent on anything, let alone an outfit for a school dance. But Sutton had a point. Prom was like high school's equivalent of a wedding. Minus all the legal bindings and marriage part. Plus she loved the shoes the moment she saw them. She only hoped that Ethan would ask her to be his date.


	17. Chapter 17

"Ethan?!" Sutton's voice boomed over the clamour of students gathered in small clusters around the halls of Arroyo High School. Ethan stopped dead in his tracks and spun around, the sound of heel-clad footsteps got closer as a hot to trot Sutton swung around the corner and into Ethan's line of sight.

"Yes?" He asked when she approached him but she pulled into an empty classroom and closed the door behind them, "What is this about, Sutton?"

She pulled off her sunglasses and looked at him, part of her swooned over the way his hair fell over his face, his chocolate brown hair but she shook off the feelings, "What is wrong with you?" Ethan just shook his head, "Why haven't you asked Emma to prom?"

Ethan rolled his eyes, "You know I don't do these lame school dances."

"Right. But we do. You need to ask Emma to prom."

Ethan shook his head again, "You can't tell me what I need to do." Then he stood up and gathered his books under his arm. It wasn't that he wasn't or wanted to ask Emma to the prom, it's just that prom wasn't his style and having Sutton parading in school to tell him that he needs to ask her sister to prom was enough for him to just call the whole thing off.

Sutton stood before him and put her hand on the door knob, "Don't you even dare think about walking on me."

Ethan scoffed, "Sutton, do you really think I am scared of you? I know everything about you. Don't think I don't know my ways around you." With that, he pushed her aside, and headed down the hallway.

Taken aback, Sutton followed him out to the hallway, watching him disappear into the crowd of students, "Ok! Well good talk! Don't forget to do what I asked you so kindly to do." She shouted down the hall.

Ethan didn't stop walking, he just shook his head without looking back.

Emma had just emptied her books into her locker when she felt someone tap on her shoulder, she jumped but turned around. Ethan laughed, "I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's okay. I was stuck in my thoughts."

Ethan nodded, "What are you doing tonight?" It was Friday night. The semester was winding down and even though finals were a few weeks away, her everyday class load was beginning to lighten. She contemplated a girl's night in the cabin with Laurel and Sutton, she looked at him. His dark eyes drew her in and his smile weakened her at the knees.

"I don't know. Nothing, why?"

"Come by the trailer at 7. I wanna talk." Then he kissed her forehead and walked away. As she watched him walk away, she pressed a hand to the spot where he kissed her. She wondered what he could possibly want to talk to her about, but she remained calm. She gathered her things and closed her locker, pulling out her iphone and opened her text messages: Hey Sutton, where are you? I'm headed to the car. Ethan came by, said he wanted to talk. Do you have any idea why? then she pressed send and headed out to her car.

When she reached her car, her phone dinged with a new text, she pulled out her phone: Sutton. She opened the message: On my way, I don't know. I haven't seen him all day. It read. Emma just looked at the message and then put her phone away.

That night, she pulled her hair into a messy ponytail and grabbed her keys out of the wooden bowl by the door that served as a holder for the family keys to spare the "where are my keys" trauma that seemed to be popular between Laurel and Sutton, "I'm heading out!" she called, though only a soft drive safely honey came from Kristen in the backroom.

As she drove, she let her mind wander. What did Ethan want to talk about. As she pulled into the dirt driveway, she saw him already standing there. He had on a pair of jeans and no shirt, damn he was beautiful, she thought. As she killed the ignition, he met her at the car door, "Hey, I'm glad you came."

She smiled, "Me too." Then he pulled a hankerchief from his back pocket.

She let out a groan, "Not this again." But she let him wrap it around her eyes anyways. She took his hand and held it tightly as he guided her around to the back of the trailer. Soon the smell of barbecue filled her nose and she smiled, "What's going on?" But before he could answer, he pulled the blindfold from her eyes and before her, in tea lights spelled Prom? A table set with her favorite foods just to the right of that. Emma drew in a breath, shock stricken, she just nodded and wrapped her arms around him. He kissed her hair and held her tight.

"I love you, Emma." He whispered, "I always have."

"I love you too, Ethan." She whispered back, a lonely tear fell down her cheek and she blinked it away. All her life she'd waited for Prince Charming to come and finally he showed up. After all, he was a Whitehorse.

After dinner, he took her out to the field, the tea light's still flickered into the night, the soft sounds of music filled the night air and they danced. They didn't know how long they'd been out there, swaying to the soft music, her eyes never left his and she finally felt like Cinderella at the ball. Ethan, her Prince Charming and she the less-fortunate foster girl turned princess.

When the last tea light flickered out, Emma lifted her chest. They were now laying in the grass looking into the night sky. The stars now served as the only light left, "What time is it?" She whispered.

Ethan looked at his phone, "12:45"

Emma shot up, "Shit! I gotta go! I told Kristen I'd be home before midnight." then she grabbed her shoes that she had kicked off at one point and headed out to her car, "Thank you for an amazing night, Ethan! I love you! Call me tomorrow." Then she threw her stuff into the car and drove off before he could even say good-bye.


	18. Chapter 18

Emma crept as quitely as she could into the house, the clock on the cable reciever read 1:15 am. She closed the front door softly and laid her keys in the bowl without making a noise, "So where have you been?" A male voice caught Emma off guard she almost screamed and suddenly bright light filled the living room of the Mercer's home. Busted. She thought.

"I'm sorry. I lost track of time." Emma excused. Back in Vegas, she'd mastered the art of sneaking in and out of Clarice'shouse, but then again, in the back of her mind she knew that Clarice didn't care where Emma went and when she'd be home. She could officially count this as her first teenage sneaking in past curfew experience.

Kristen looked at her, a cup of tea in her hands, the string of the bag still draped over the side of the mug and she looked like she hadn't been to bed yet, "Do you know what time it is?"

Emma looked at the cable receiver again, "1:16?"

Kristen nodded, "What time were you supposed to be home?"

Emma looked at her bare feet that were blackened with dirt from the field where she and Ethan had danced, "11:30" she confessed. She knew she was in trouble but she hoped Kristen would allow her to still go to prom after all, Sutton just spent over 3 grand on her dress and shoes.

"I trusted you, Emma. Go to bed. We will talk about this in the morning."

As Emma started up the stairs, she stopped halfway and then turned around heading back down, she wrapped her arms around Kristen, "Thank you." She whispered. Even though she knew she was in trouble, she was grateful that someone cared enough to punish her like their own child.

Confused, Kristen wrapped her arms around her daughter, "I love you, Emma. I don't want anything to happen to you. Promise me you won't do it again?" Emma nodded against her shoulder, "Go to bed, sweetheart. I'll see you in the morning." Then she kissed her and watched as Emma headed up the stairs into the darkness of the hallway.

She crashed into the softness of her throw pillows breathing in the smell of the lavender sheet spray Kristen used after making her bed in the morning. She wanted so badly to crash into Sutton's room and tell her everything about her night but she knew that Sutton would kill her if she woke her up at 1:30 in the morning. Instead, she tossed her shoes into the closet and pulled out a fresh pair of pajama pants and a tank top. When she was dressed, she pulled back the covers and curled under the warmth. Even tough se allowed sleep to finally over take her, she smiled. Despite her mishap with the curfew, the night had been perfect.

When Emma awoke the next day, She crept into Sutton's room, "Sutton?" she whispered, she pushed open the door to reveal an already made bed. Maybe she's downstairs she thought. As she headed downstairs she could hear laughter, her families voices clattering around the table. Definitely not the typical Saturday morning Emma was used to at Clarice's. Usually that consisted of grabbing a bowl of cereal and heading back to her bedroom to eat alone. When she entered the room, Kristen looked up, "Morning sleepy head. Are you hungry? I made french toast. I left some for you." Emma nodded and joined her sisters at the table as Kristen prepared a plate for her daughter.

"So how'd last night go?" Sutton said poking Emma's upper arm. A sly smile across her face.

Emma looked at her, "Perfect." Then a smile crossed her own face at the memory.

"So? Did he ask you?" Sutton provoked. Emma nodded softly and Sutton let out a yelp, "I knew he'd ask you!"

Kristen looked up over the joy of her kids celebratory cheers, "Did Ethan ask you to prom, sweetie?"

Emma let out a joyful laugh, "yeah!It was so cute! He smelled out PROM in tea lights and he made me dinner." Even though jealousy still boiled deep down in Sutton's belly, she was happy for Emma.

"He is so romantic!" Laurel swooned. Her hands pressed against her chest, "Now Sutton needs a date and we will all be accounted for on Prom night."

Sutton swallowed hard at Laurel's comment. Even though she knew Laurel meant it in a nice way, she knew that no one was going to ask her. After all, 90% of Arroyo thought Emma was her, and Emma was already going with Ethan. She drew in a breath and smiled at Laurel, "Yeah, I don't think that's gonna happen."

Laurel's brow furrowed, "What about Thayer?"

Sutton looked at her, "What about Thayer?"

"Why don't you go with him?"

"I don't want a pity date, Laurel. I'm fine going on my own now can we please just talk about something else?"

Laurel looked at her platte, "You brought up the topic, God."

Sutton stood up, "I was asking Emma a question. None of it had anything to do with you."

"Ok! That's enough!" Kristen intervened, "we are all happy for Emma. Sutton someone will ask you to the prom. Laurel stop provoking your sister."

Laurel looked up at Kristen, "Ok, I'm sorry. I was just asking, God."

Sutton spun around to look at Laurel, "Well it's none of your damn business!" Then she stood up and headed upstairs, Emma followed suit.

Inside her room, Sutton grabbed her laptop, opening it to her Facebook page, it was all she could do from bursting into tears. Emma knocked softly, "Hey, it's me."

"Come in." Sutton said calmly.

Emma pushed open the cracked door, "Hey." She moved to Sutton's bed, sitting across from her twin, "Are you sure you're okay with me going to prom with Ethan?"

Sutton wanted to say no. She couldn't help that she still loved him, but she knew it was Emma he loved. She pushed back a tear before looking at her sister, "Yeah." She said coolly, "It's fine… I mean…" then she sighed, "I don't know. I guess I'm just jealous. I mean you only get prom once and going solo is lame."

Emma put her hand on her sisters knee, "I won't go with him if you don't want me to."

Sutton looked at her, how could Emma be this kind? It wasn't like Sutton was always the nicest person in the world to her and yet, she put Sutton before herself, "no, Emma. Go. You already told him you would and you already have the perfect dress. Cinder-Emma and her glass slippers." She cracked a smile at her joke and Emma did the same.

Emma looked at Sutton, "You still love him. I can't do this to you." Then she reached for her cell phone.

Just as Emma was about to call Ethan to cancel, Sutton put her hand on her sister's phone, "Yes, I do love him. I always will. But he loves you, Emma. I can never be what he wants. I'm not you. Let's face it, you're everything I'm not. Everyone is always going to love you more than me."

Emma looked at Sutton, a worried look on her face, "Sutton, stop. Everyone loves you. Kristen, Laurel, and me." She paused when she mentioned herself. She never knew real love until she came to Arizona. The life she'd built in just the few months she'd spent with the Mercer's was enough to erase 14 years of loneliness she had in Vegas. Emma reached out for her sister, pulling her into a hug, "You mean more to me than any boy I could ever date. You're my sister, the only thing I've wanted above everything in this world and here you are. I'm not ruining us for some guy. If you really don't want me to go with him, I won't. Just say the word."

Sutton laid her head against Emma's shoulder and closed her eyes, "No Emma, go. I'll be alright."

When Emma pulled away she looked at Sutton, "You sure?"

Sutton nodded, "Yeah, I'm sure."

"Thank you, Sutton." then she got up and headed to her own room. Pulling the blue prom dress from it's hanger, she held it to her body, spinning around in circles and watching the chiffon swirl around her legs. She half wondered what Lexi would say if she knew that not only was she, Emma Becker, going to Prom, but she also had a date to escort her as well. Emma laid back on her bed and smiled. Now she couldn't wait for prom and hoped it would be as amazing as they make it seem in the movies.


	19. Chapter 19

"Emma! Let's go!" Sutton's voice shot up the stairs. Emma was still at her vanity, putting the finishing touches on her makeup while Mad's curled the last few strands of Emma's long brown hair.

"Yeah, I'm almost done!" Emma called back. then she looked at her friend in the mirror, "Do you think he is going to think I am pretty?" She asked. She'd never actually primped for a school dance except for the homecoming dance earlier that year and Kristen was the one who did her hair and makeup that time.

Mads looked at Emma, "He is going to think you are stunning." She assured her.

Emma smiled, "I hope so." She stood up and grabbed her clutch off her bed, "You ready?" Mads nodded and the girls headed down the stairs. At the bottom, waiting for her like any gentleman was Ethan, a smile across his face as he saw for the first time his prom date, his girlfriend, his Emma. He extended his arm and she gingerly rested her hand against it.

Then he cleared his throat, "I, uh, I got you something." She smiled at his awkwardness. She knew these formals were so not Ethan Whitehorse's style, but she loved him for taking her anyways.

"Really?" She smiled, when he pulled out a white and blue corsage, her heart skipped a beat. This kind of thing only happened in movies never for her. But here she was in a three thousand dollar outfit and a handsome man to escort her. As true to any prom tradition, the girls gathered in the Mercer's backyard for formal pictures. Even Sutton had agreed to let Thayer escort her to the prom. Laurel stood in her all white chiffon and lace short dress between Mads who wore an elegant all black gown and her own date. Every girl was stunning, the men were just as handsome.

As night fall began to set in, the girls kissed Kristen good-bye and promised to be home by midnight. Emma especially made it a point that this time she wouldn't fuck up. They all climbed into the white limo the boys had pooled in together to rent and as they drove Mad's date Luke pulled a bottle from the mini fridge, Asti Spumonte, "Here's to an amazing night and an amazing prom." With that, he popped the cork, making the girls jump, and thick foam to fall down the sides of the bottle. Luke grabbed flutes and poured champagne for everyone. Then he pulled Mads into a deep kiss.

"So how'd you score the booze?" Sutton asked taking a long sip of her champagne. It wasn't exactly what she'd wanted to be drinking on prom night but it was better than nothing so she downed the contents and went back for seconds.

"stole it from my dads wine fridge, he will never know it's missing. He's too drunk half the time to keep track on this shit." It was true, Luke Parker's father was well-known for being a class-A drunk. He was arrested once for having abused Luke's mom after a particularly heavy night of drinking.

"Well good choice." Sutton said raising her glass, then she again downed it and cringed as it went down.

The limo arrived at the Grand Marble Hotel, the luxury resort the student government charged the students $150 per person so they could book the ballroom. As everyone filed out of the limo, Sutton stumbled a little the effects of the alcohol hitting her harder than she'd expected. Emma grabbed her arm, stabilizing her, "Hey, are you okay?"

Sutton looked at her sister, "Yeah. I'm good. I'm great. Let's get this damn party started." And with that, she headed inside.

The ballroom was packed with students from Arroyo and even some that came from other schools in the district. Music pounded so hard the walls shook. Bright lights searched across the room and a disco ball hung from the ceiling. Surrounding the tables, mason jar lanterns gave on a luminescent feeling and the girls claimed their assigned table. They ditched their bags and headed for the dance floor. All but Ethan. Emma watched as the others disappeared into the crowd then she turned to her date, "Don't you want to dance?" She asked sitting down next to him.

Ethan looked at his feet, "I'm not particularly fond of dancing." He confessed.

"Oh c'mon! After all those dancing lessons?! I know there's a dancing star in you." She said as she pulled him to his feet.

He recoiled his hand, "Emma, please?"

Emma's face bent into a frown, "Ethan, don't be like this. Please, just one dance?" She put her hands in a begging motion.

Ethan looked at her, her wide brown eyes deepened with sadness, how could he say no to that face? He sighed, "Ok ok ok. One dance."

She smiled in success and pulled him towards the rest if the group just as the fast song slowed to a ballad and Ethan wrapped his arms around Emma's neck, he allowed himself to get lost in her eyes, letting the soft melody carry them away. Emma felt like she was being held completely by his strength. Her eyes gazed into his and for a moment they were alone out on that dance floor. The spotlight shone on only them. "I am holding you closer than most, cause you are my heaven." the lyrics surrounded them. Ethan pushed a stray strand of hair out of her eyes, the softness of his touch made her shiver. Somewhere in the middle of the song, Emma found herself pressing her face against his chest, his heart beat in her ear, but she smiled. When the song ended, the DJ announced that dinner was being served and that they were to return to their assigned table. Emma pulled away to see the others had already headed back. But it didn't matter, she took Ethan's hand and walked back, a perpetual smile plastered against her face.

Back at the table, the others were already gathered. Luke and Ryan, Laurel's date, were discussing motorcycles. Ethan gladly jumped in on the conversation. Mads and Laurel were taking selfies on Mads iPhone. Mad's grabbed Emma's arm, "get in here girlie!" She said holding up the phone, Emma jumped in and put a smile on her face. This moment solidified every ounce of fear she ever had that she belonged in here.

Over a dinner of prime rib, mashed potatoes and asparagus, the group discussed the memories they'd made that school year, "But of course the best and most amazing memory I will never forget was getting to meet literally my other half. My twin sister, Emma." Sutton said over a cheers, the group clinked glasses.

During dessert, Emma felt her phone vibrate in her clutch and she reached down to pick it up. It was then she saw the 30 missed calls and 20 texts all from her mom. Emma looked at Sutton, "Check your phone." She said a serious tone in her voice. Sutton grabbed her bag from off the chair and pulled out her phone, she found the same thing.

"What the hell?" Then Emma saw the voicemail.

"Emma it's mom. I don't want to intrude on your prom night. But somethings happened to your dad. I'm at the hospital. Call me."

Emma stood up and grabbed her sisters arm, "we gotta go. Laurel get up." Laurel protested but Emma just shot her a get up now look and Laurel obeyed. With that they headed towards the door.


	20. Chapter 20

Emma felt like her head was spinning. At some point in the night, it began raining. Emma, Laurel and Sutton sought shelter under the valet parking station, "Emma!" Ethan screamed as he came running out of the hotel room.

Emma turned and looked at him, "Go back inside." She ordered. When the cab she'd called earlier pulled up, the girls all climbed in trying to escape the down pour.

Ethan caught up to her and looked at her, "What's going on?"

"I don't know. I just have to go. I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you." Then she climbed into the cab next to Sutton who scooted over to make room for her twin. Now the three girls were squished in the backseat of the cab.

"Emma, I'm not staying here without you." Ethan protested.

"Ethan, no. Just go back inside. Tell the others we are sorry we had to go." Emma said pushing his hand off the door and closing it.

Ethan opened the passengers side door and slid into the seat, "I'm not leaving without you, Emma. I'm here for you."

Emma didn't know what to do. Part of her was happy that Ethan wanted to be with her, but she was pissed at his persistence. All she knew is that she wanted to be with her family. She instructed the driver which hospital to take them to.

When they arrived, Emma paid the driver and ran into the lobby. To the left, she found an information desk. A woman about 23 sat behind the desk typing on a computer, "Hi." Emma said trying to keep her calm, "I am looking for Ted Mercer's room." the young woman nodded and typed away on the computer.

"He is in surgery right now." The woman reported. then instructed them to the waiting room on the fifth floor where they would find their mom.

The girls rushed to the elevator and pressed up, inside the elevator Emma relaxed against the back wall and drew in a breath. Ethan grabbed her hand, "It's okay, Emma." He said stroking her thumb.

She shook her head, "I'm scared, Ethan."

He pulled her into his embraced and kissed her forehead, "I know, baby. But I'm not leaving your side."

"Where's Sutton?" Emma asked.

Sutton took a step towards her sister, "I'm here, Em." Then she pulled Laurel into a hug pressing their bodies against Emma.

When they arrived on the fifth floor they poured out into the hallway, "My girls!" They heard Kristen say from down the hall. They raced to their mom and embraced in a hug. The hospital was rather quiet tonight, aside from the Mercer's, Only a few others mulled around the waiting room in the same state of mind as they were.

"How is he, Mom?" Sutton asked pulling away.

Kristen just shook her head, "It's bad baby girl." Kristen said pushing a lock of hair behind Sutton's ear, "He had another heart attack. They rushed him into surgery but it doesn't look good."

Sutton tried hard not to cry. Emma took her sister's hand and gave it a squeeze, but Sutton just turned and put her head on Emma's shoulder. She moved them to the waiting room and found some chairs to sit on. Ethan took a seat next to her, "I wish I wasn't wearing this horrible dress." She groaned putting her head on Ethan's shoulder. She'd been in constant motion since they'd left the prom and this was the first time she was able to relax.

Ethan wrapped his arm around her, "Do you want me to go to the gift shop and see if they sell pajama's?"

Emma looked at him, "Actually, yeah." She stood up and removed her heels, "I will go with you." Ethan removed his jacket and they let the others know where they were going. Sutton and Laurel opted to tag along as they were still fully dressed in their prom dresses.

Down in the gift shop, they found a small selection of pajama's. Sutton found a purple plaid pair and a plain white t-shirt, with a pair of white sandal slippers. Emma found a pink pair with sheep on them and sheep slippers and Laurel chose blue with clouds and the same white slippers Sutton chose. When they left the gift shop they found a bathroom to change into and headed back to the waiting room. When they returned they found Kristen talking quietly with the doctor. She was crying softly. Emma's stomach churned and she swallowed hard. She grabbed Sutton's hand and Laurel's the other. Ethan put his hand to his mouth as Kristen turned around. Her eyes were blood red and her cheeks were stained by her tears. She reached out for the girls and pulled them into a hug, "Mom what's going on?" Laurel asked, "Is daddy okay?" But Kristen just cried harder and hugged her girls a little tighter.

"Girls there wasn't much they could do for your father. I'm sorry babies. He passed away." Emma felt numb. Every limb in her body felt heavy and she swore her heart stopped.

Sutton just shook her head, "No! You're lying. You're a liar! You've always ben a liar." She screamed at Kristen and stood up.

"Sutton!" Kristen said through her tears, but she just took off. Emma wanted to follow after her but she couldn't move. Ethan put his hand on her leg and she looked at him.

"I need to find Sutton." She declared and stood up following the same way Sutton went when she stormed out. Ethan followed after her.

"Emma! Wait for me." But independent Emma didn't wait for him to catch up, she just followed the path down the hallway to a door labeled "ER-Doctor's Only" it was there that she found Sutton leaning against the wall, tears poured down her cheeks. Immediately, she reach out for her sister, pulling her into a hug. Sutton relaxed into her twins embrace and Emma allowed her own tears to fall down her cheeks.

"I didn't get to say good-bye." Sutton said against Emma's shoulder.

"I know." Emma said holding her sister tighter.

"I just want to hug him again."

Emma looked at Sutton, the vulnerable side of her sister she had never seen before. But she hugged her anyways, "I know Sutton. I want to to." But they just stayed there, holding each other, tears fell down their cheeks and Ethan stepped away letting them have their sisterly moment.


	21. Chapter 21

Emma looked at herself in the full length mirror. The black knee length dress didn't look right. She took in a breath and pulled her hair into a messy bun. She was all alone in the bathroom of the church on the morning of her father's memorial service. She looked down at her phone, no new messages. She sighed again. She was about to reapply her mascara for the -nth time when the bathroom door swung open. A mourning Rebecca entered and looked up, "Oh baby." She cried wrapping her arms around her daughter. Emma just stood there, uncomfortable. Even though Rebecca was possibly the last person she wanted to see today, she felt bad for her mom and returned the gestures, "I'm so sorry baby." She cried against Emma's shoulder.

Emma didn't really say anything. She wasn't sure what to say. To be honest she hadn't said much of anything in the week since Ted passed away. She kept low, barely coming out of her room to eat and shower, let alone socialize. She evaded Ethan. Every time he called, she ignored it. When she saw him in the halls at school she would exit quickly avoiding eye contact. She barely spoke to anyone outside of Sutton. Somehow Sutton was the only person she needed at the moment. She knew today it wasn't going to be so easy. She knew that even though she didn't ask him to come, he was going to be there anyways. She released her grasp from around her mom and kindly excused herself.

It wasn't long after she'd turned the corner from the restrooms that she saw him, resting against the wall, his foot propped up in the savant kind of way. She wanted to turn the way but it was too late, when he saw her he pushed off the wall and strode her way. It wasn't that she was mad at him, or even that she didn't want to see him. She just wasn't ready to be a happy couple again, "Hey." He said coolly. She looked up at him, still his chocolate eyes melted her like a popsicle on a hot summer day.

"Hey." She said back.

"So why are you avoiding me?" He looked past her shoulder and then back at her, waiting for an answer.

An answer was not exactly what Emma was ready or wanting to talk about right now, "Ethan, seriously? This is not the place to be discussing this. I need to get back with my family." She pushed aside him and walked into the large sanctuary. She was sure that almost a thousand people had turned out to say their good-byes. After all, Ted Mercer was a well-loved man in his community and in his field. She spotted Kristen sitting in an all black dress suit, Laurel and Sutton on either side of her at the front of the church. Emma strode down the long aisle to meet them, and when she did, Kristen stood up, wrapping her arms around Emma. Behind her, a projection screen played a slideshow of photo's Kristen put together. Eric Clapton's "Tears in Heaven" played softly along with the clips. Several of the photo's were from Sutton and Laurel's childhood. Ted dressed as Santa Clause at Christmas holding a toddler Laurel, Sutton grinning wide-eyed arms wrapped around his leg. A family vacation from a white water rafting trip they took when Laurel and Sutton were pre-teens. A photo more recently of Sutton and Ted in the hospital playing a card game. One of Kristen and Ted at their wedding and another one from their 10 year anniversary cruise when Laurel and Sutton spent a week with Mads and Thayer. emma watched each photo pass by, her heart sank with each childhood photo she saw of Sutton. She had missed all of these years with her father and her sister. Silently she cursed Rebecca for what she did when she was a baby, but then a photo caught her eye, it was from the father daughter dance earlier that year. A candid still of Ted leaning Emma back mid-dance. She was laughing and he looked at her with so much love. Even though at the time he thought it was Sutton, a caption caught her attention: My dearest Emma, I didn't know it back then, but I realize now this was you. I would give up anything to go back to this dance. To have knowingly had the chance to dance with my other daughter, it meant the world to me then and it would mean the world to me now. Tears welled in Emma's eyes. Kristen leaned over and said, "He wanted me to tell you that, Emma and I never got the chance to. He really loved you sweetheart." Emma's heart pulled and she let her tears fall, splashing on the black cotton skirt. If there ever was a time in her life when she needed her daddy it was right now. Just as the slideshow came to an end, the service began.

Emma leaned over to Kristen, "Will I have a chance to say a few words?"

Kristen nodded, "Of course baby." She gave Emma's hand a squeeze.

When it was time for the Eulogies, Sutton went first. She spoke about all the times she had taken her father for granted, how she realized in hindsight that he only wanted what was best for her and that even though the way her life wasn't exactly ideal, it was the best a man could provide for his wife and daughters. In the end, she closed with a lyric from his favorite song, "Faithfully" and then headed down the steps of the alter. She met Emma at the bottom with a hug and joined her mom and Laurel back on the pew. Emma looked out into the dark crowd. The bright white lights blinded her and she looked down at the podium, "I grew up not knowing who my family was. It wasn't until Sutton contacted me on the internet that I even knew I had a twin sister." She paused, "before I came to Phoenix, I lived in a foster home in Vegas. My life was nothing to be idolized. When I came to Phoenix, I realized that my life was anything but ordinary." She paused again, unsure of what she was about to say was exactly the best thing to say at a funeral, but she drew in a breath, "My twin sister and I are products of an affair." She licked her lips and looked out into the crowd, "My birth mother separated Sutton and I when we were born. Selfishly wanting to keep one of us for herself." Her heart was beating fast now and she felt dizzy. Sweat beaded her hair line, but she kept her calm, "When I was three, my birth mom left me at a day care center and never came back for me. That's how I ended up in foster care. I was shifted through six different homes and a dozen schools before finally landing in a home in Vegas. My foster mom was anything but a mom. She worked late nights at a casino and she slept through the day. She didn't care who I was with or where I went. She barely knew my name. When I came to Phoenix I immediately excepted into the Mercer family. Granted, they thought I was Sutton and saw nothing wrong. What they didn't know was that the little lost girl in me had been crying out for a family like this. The family my birth mother never could have ever provided for me. When I found out that Ted wasn't just Sutton's adoptive father, he was our biological father, I felt closer to this family than I could have ever imagined. Laurel wasn't just a friend, she was a sister by blood. I finally found my family." Emma pushed a tear from her cheek and looked away drawing in a deep breath, "But the one person who never stopped loving me no matter if I was Sutton or if I was Emma, was Kristen. She was a victim in all of this and yet she loved me unconditionally from day one. I had never experienced the kind of love I experienced with Kristen. The eternal, unconditional love of a mother." Deep down Emma knew her words had to be cutting Rebecca like a knife. After all, no matter how badly Emma didn't want it to be true, Kristen wasn't her mother, Rebecca was. But se didn't care, Kristen had given her everything she dreamt about in foster care, "Ted was my birth father. Sutton is my twin sister and Laurel my half sister. But the one person I'm not related to by blood has been my biggest supporter since I came to Phoenix and that's my mom. And even tough, this was supposed to be in remembrance of my dad, I wanted Kristen to know how much her love and her presence in my life has impacted and meant to me. Daddy, wherever you are. Save me a dance in Heaven." She fought back tears again, "I love you." Then she blew a kiss up into the sky and thanked the crowd. Back at the pew, a crying Kristen stood and embraced her daughter, a unison "aw" rode through the crowd, "I love you mom. No matter what, you will always be my mom." Kristen kissed her daughters forehead and they sat back down as the minister began his sermon about the life we live on earth and the life we have prepared for us in Heaven.

After the service, Emma stood outside the church. The sunlight on her shoulders warmed her since the church was as cold as a freezer. She was alone when Rebecca approached, "What the hell was that?" She asked under her breath.

Emma remained calm, "What was what?" She knew what Rebecca meant, but she evaded the question.

"That speech in there. I am your mother. Not Kristen." Rebecca's comment made Emma's blood boil and she sucked in a breath.

"You may have given me my life, Rebecca. But you are not my mom. You are the furthest thing from it. You ruined my life. So excuse me for clinging to the one person who ever made me feel like my existence was wanted.

"Emma, you know I-" Rebecca started.

Emma cut her off, "Don't you even dare say that you wanted me. You abandoned me, mom. Do you remember that? Because I do. I remember that day and every day after. I remember when I was 12 and the night my foster dad raped me. HE RAPED ME! And you let it happen. If you ever think I will ever consider you anything close to a mother, you have another thing coming. I'm done with this conversation." With that, she turned on her heel and walked back down the hall of the church, leaving Rebecca stunned on the sidewalk.

Inside, she ran into Ethan again, "Not you again."

Ethan looked at her, his brow furrowed, "You know what? I'm getting kind of sick of this Emma. I didn't do anything to you. As a matter of fact, I was there for you the night your father died. And every day since you've avoided me, not answered my calls and basically treated me like shit. What did I do to you to deserve this Emma? I know you're hurting. I get that, but you don't have to take it out on me again. It was a wonderful service. Sorry for your loss, but I have to get home now." He pushed past her and headed out towards the parking lot.

"Ethan, wait." But it was too late, she watched him push past the crowd of mourners and down to his motorcycle, "DAMN IT!" She spoke a little loudly and a group of young girls looked up at her. She just gave them a sheepish look and walked away. She needed to be alone so she grabbed her keys and headed to her car not bothering to let anyone know she was leaving.


	22. Chapter 22

Emma slammed her phone on her bed. It was late that night and she'd been calling Ethan since he stormed out at the funeral that morning. Even though she eventually gathered her cool enough to head back to the reception and the burial, she still wished she'd gone after him. It didn't shock her that he was avoiding her. He wasn't exactly happy when he left that morning. She sighed and picked up her phone again, opening her text messages: Hey Ethan. She started to type. I am so sorry for this morning. Things have been so crazy this past week. Please know that I'm not mad at you. I love you. When my dad died, I didn't know what to do. All I ever wanted was a family. This is the best thing that has ever happened to me and now part of it is gone. He was my dad, Ethan. You were right, I never should have taken it out on you. But I was scared. I didn't handle any of it well. I avoided you, my mom, Laurel. The only person I wanted was Sutton. Aside from Rebecca, she's all I have left of my real biological family. Please don't be mad at me. I really do love you, Ethan. Please call me? She swallowed hard and pressed send. She watched the blue bubble pop up on her screen and the "delivered" notification pop up below the message.

She put her phone on her dresser and grabbed her robe from the coat rack Sutton bought for her at pottery barn. She headed to the bathroom for a shower. When she returned she immediately went for her phone. No new messages. She sighed and pulled up her message. the notification that he read it was the first thing she looked at. She knew he was mad at her but she didn't expect him to ignore her. Emma composed another message: Ethan, please call me? I know you are angry. But please let me explain. She pressed send and tossed her phone on the bed, opening her closet and pulling out a fresh pair of pajama's. When she finished getting dressed, she wrapped her hair in her towel and her phone buzzed. Her heart skipped a beat and she looked at it. New Message from Ethan. She swallowed and opened the message: I just don't think this is what I want. His message read.

Emma felt her head spin: Ethan don't say that. I love you. She sent her reply.

A few moments alter her phone buzzed: I need some time, Emma.

Emma felt hot tears pierce her eyelids. Was he breaking up with her, she wondered. She wanted to ask him if he was breaking up with her but she decided against it. She laid on her bed, pulling her macbook onto her lap from the floor. She was pulling up her Facebook page when someone knocked on her door. Emma looked up. It was Kristen.

"Hi sweetie." She said pushing open the door, "I wanted to say good night."

Emma smiled through impending tears, "Ok" She mustered.

Kristens brow furrowed, "Are you okay?" Her simple question made Emma's face pinch and two tears rolled down her cheek. She didn't even speak, she just shook her head. In a flash, Kristen was by her side. Emma sat up and put her head on her mom's shoulder. Kristen comforted her daughter. She wrapped her arm around Emma's shoulder and held her tight, "What's got you so upset baby?" her voice was soft, loving.

"I don't know." Emma choked on her own tears and coughed, "I messed up."

Kristen shushed Emma, her hand rubbed her back, "How did you mess up?" Despite her internal panic, she stayed calm. She worried what Emma meant by messed.

"At dad's funeral…" She sobbed, "I yelled at Ethan. Now he's mad and told me he needs time, whatever that means." She cried harder. Burying her head in her moms shoulder. She never had someone to hold her when her heart broke like this. She had to admit, it was kind of nice.

Kristen sighed a breath of relief, "Why did you yell at him?"

Emma didn't say anything she just shrugged. Then after a moment she spoke, "I don't know why I yelled at him. I just can't do this." She hadn't been in Phoenix very long but she already felt attached to this family. After learning that Ted was her birth father, she had dreams of having a real father-daughter relationship. The kind she'd read about in books and seen in the movies, "I didn't get any time with him."

"With who?" Kristen's voice remained soft.

By now Emma had stopped crying, she heaved heavily as she began to slow her breathing, her eyes stung from the tears and her nose felt like it was swollen twice it's size. She sniffled and drew in a deep breath, "With dad." Her voice was almost a whisper.

Kristen hugged Emma tighter, "Oh sweet heart." She felt bad. All of Sutton's life she had her father. Even if he was just her adoptive father for most of her life, he was her father. Emma never had her father, or a mother for that matter. Kristen kissed Emma's head.

"And I don't know. I just didn't feel like being a couple after dad died. I just wanted to be alone."

"I know baby girl. But you should have talked to Ethan about it. He knew you were going through a tough time. But he was there for you."

"I know!" Emma explained as if to say, I know, he was so good to me and I screwed it up.

"Tell ya what, why don't we go downstairs and I will make you some tea. Just give Ethan some time to calm down. He will come around and when he does, be there for him." Then she kissed Emma again and stood up, "Come on. Let's get some tea."

Emma smiled, "I think I'm just gonna try and sleep. My eye's are killing me."

Kristen looked down at her, "Alright then. Want me to tuck you in?"

Emma smiled, it was cheesy but she liked it when Kristen tucked her in. It made her feel warm and safe. That was a feeling Emma never knew but began to quickly enjoy. Kristen pulled the comforter over her daughter and pushed a few stray stranded of Emma's dark brown hair off her face, "Ethan doesn't know what a wonderful girlfriend he has and when he realizes it. He will be back. He loves you and even though fights happen. True love is stronger than that. I know true love. Your father was my true love and fights happen. But love persists on. This is true love Emma and Ethan knows that. He just mad right now. Give him some time and he will come around." Then she kissed Emma's forehead again and headed out the door. On her way out she looked back, "Good night Emma. I love you. Always and forever." Then she turned out the light and cracked her door. Emma flipped over on her side. She hoped that her moms words were true but she still had a twinge of doubt. She played his words over in her head, trying to piece together a meaning, a hidden message.

Eventually, the strain of thinking and the pain from crying overtook her and she succumbed to sleep, letting the energy wash over her.

**This chapter was based loosely on real-life events. My dad didn't die or anything. But the strain of romance has and this scene was very similar to one that I went through when I was younger. Please review and let me know how you like the story! I loooove feedback. It gives me inspiration to keep writing. :)**


	23. Chapter 23

Emma hadn't seen or from Ethan all weekend. Despite her want to text him, she refrained, remembering the words of her mom, "Give him his time." Now it was lunch on Monday morning and she hadn't seen Ethan all day. Emma grabbed her lunch tray and headed to the trash. She was about to throw her trash away when someone stopped at the trash can too. She looked up, "Oh hey." She said. Her heart skipped a beat.

Ethan just looked at her, "Hi Emma." Then he tossed his trash away and turned on his heel heading back to the table where Jordan and Thayer sat, still eating.

Emma ran to catch up with him, "Ethan, wait." She called after him.

Ethan stopped and turned around, "what?" he asked. His voice was stiff, terse.

"Hey." She said, for lack of really anything else to say.

Ethan stopped walking and looked at her, "We've said our hello's, Emma. If you have anything else you want to say just say it."

Emma looked at him. She had a lot to say to him. The problem was that she didn't know how to say it. She looked around then back at him, "Ethan, I'm sorry." She began.

"Yeah, I know. I get it."

"I don't know what to say Ethan. I told you I was sorry. Why are you angry at me. Don't you love me?" Emma bit back tears. She didn't want to cry in school, but she couldn't help the surge of emotions coursing through her.

"I do love you, Emma. But the way you treated me was completely uncalled for. You needed me and I was there for you. So how do you pay me back? By ignoring me and snapping at me at the funeral? Why shouldn't I be mad, Emma?" a tear feel down her cheek, "Stop crying, Emma."

This wasn't how she wanted this scenario to plan out, but somehow she knew it was going to end up this way. She tried holding in her feelings, but tears began slowly falling down her cheeks streaking her makeup, "I know. I didn't handle it well. I'm sorry. I really am. But I told you that. I can't change the past." She wiped her tears away with the back of her hand. Ethan looked at her. It wasn't that he didn't love her or care about her. In fact, it killed him to see her so upset. He sighed, letting his cool guy exterior go and he wrapped his arms around Emma pulling her into him. She relaxed her head on his chest and allowed the last of her tears to fall. She unwrapped her arms that crossed her chest and wrapped them around Ethan, "I'm sorry Ethan." She whispered.

"I know, Emma." Then he kissed her head, "I just want to see you happy."

Emma looked up at him, "You make me happy, Ethan. Very happy."

"And I'm when I'm with you. That's why it hurt me so bad that you acted the way you did."

Emma nodded, "I know" she said softly, regretting her past actions, "And I really am sorry."

Ethan smiled, "I love you baby." Then he kissed her. Emma smiled against his lips. This was how she wanted the scenario to play out, his arms around her, his lips kissing hers. She felt a rush of warmth run through her.

"I love you too." She said between kisses. Just then the bell rang, Ethan grabbed her hand and headed into the school. He walked her to her class.

When school was over, she met up with Sutton and Laurel, "So it went well with Ethan, I see." Laurel cooed as Emma walked up to the car, her books tucked under her arm.

She couldn't help but smile, "Yeah. How'd you know?"

"We saw you making out during lunch." Laurel pointed out.

"We weren't making out. Just making up." Emma laughed.

Laurel nodded, "Mhmm. Making up, making out. It's all semantics." They climbed into the car and headed home. Emma promised Ethan she'd meet him at the cabin to study for finals. She was glad that this was her senior year and the last finals she'd ever have to take for high school.

Later that day, Sutton pulled up to Thayer's apartment above the country club, she looked behind her to see if she was alone and then knocked on the door. She tapped her foot and then she heard the sound of the lock pulling back and the door crack open. Thayer was now standing before her, shirtless. Even though she had said that sleeping with him was a big mistake, she had to admit that he looked very good shirtless, "Hey, did I wake you?" She asked looking at his mussed up hair.

Thayer yawned, "It's fine. Come in." She smiled and pushed past him into the foyer of the tiny apartment. She looked around the room, other than the messed up sheets on his bed, the room was almost OCD clean. Not even a speck of dust could be seen. She remembered his obsession with cleanliness when she stayed with him in LA. She sat on his bed and looked up at him, "how have you been?" He asked sitting down next to her.

Sutton took in a sigh, "I don't know. Good, I guess." She shrugged her shoulders. She hadn't really given much thought to Ted since he'd passed away, not because she didn't care but she knew that if she gave it thought, she would eventually break down.

Thayer put his hand on her's that was pressing into the bed, holding up her weight, "I'm sorry for your loss." Such a cliche statement, he thought. But it was true. Even if Alec wasn't his father by birth, it would still b difficult moving on if he died.

Sutton looked down, tears welled up in her eyes and she avoided his gaze, "It's okay" Her voice was barely a whisper. She fought back the tears, trying regain composure. But who was she kidding, not even strong-willed Sutton could fight this. She squeezed her eyes as tears splashed on her jeans. When Thayer saw this he wrapped his arms around her. She fell into his embrace. Finally letting herself go.

She didn't know how long she'd been crying, but Thayer never took his arms off her. Occasionally, he would rub his hands on her arms and tell her that it was okay. When her crying stilled she looked up at him, embarrassed for her actions and she sat up, "I'm so sorry, Thayer. I shouldn't have come here." She said standing up, "I'm gonna go."

She was reaching for her purse when he grabbed her hand and she spun around, "No. It's fine. Stay?"

Sutton looked at him, "Are you sure?"

Thayer stood up and took her hands, "I'm sure. Don't leave." Then he leaned in, hesitated for a moment before kissing her. The first time since they were in LA. Sutton wanted to pull back, this wasn't supposed to happen. Instead, she deepened the kiss, opening her mouth a little allowing his tongue to slip into her mouth. Her mind raced, what the hell was she doing. But before she could realize what was happening, Thayer was slipping his hand up her shirt. She pulled away from his lips long enough to remove her shirt. Her hands traced the lines on his back and running her fingers along the rim of his jeans, tugging on them slightly. Thayer's hands went to her back and unclipped her bra letting the garment fall to the floor. Sutton pushed Thayer against the bed, watching him fall back. She crawled over top of him balancing her weight on her hands and began kissing her again. His hands pushed her hair off her face and suddenly she was moving down kissing along his strong jawline, his neck, down his torso and suddenly she was pulling his jeans off. She crawled back up his body and kissed him again. Thayer put his arm around her and flipped over so that he was on top. He kept kissing her. Following the same path on her that she'd done on him. His fingers threaded hers as he kissed down her torso. She sucked in a breath and writhed beneath him. She was fully aware of what she was doing, but a part of her held her there, wanting more. She didn't really give it much thought until it was over. She panted as she caught her breath. She turned her head to look at the man laying beside her. This time, it wasn't a mistake. For once, she did something she actually wanted to do. It wasn't to get revenge or get even with anyone and she actually enjoyed herself. She smiled as she slipped her hand under the cover, finding his hand, she threaded her fingers through his and cuddled into his embrace. She breathed in the smell of cologne and sweat on his skin. She closed her eyes and let herself fall into sleep.

Emma had spent the past twenty minutes on the same question. Frustrated, she flung her pencil and it bounced towards the open door, "Whoa. Don't try to kill me first thing." Ethan laughed.

"Stop." Emma said running her hands through her hair.

Ethan put up his hands. Clearly, he'd walked into the line of fire, "What is wrong?" He asked.

"Nothing. This damn calculus final is going to kill me." She groaned.

Ethan never liked math, but he had been doing relatively well in Calculus since he'd met Emma. He leaned over her shoulder and looked at her work, "What problem are you on?"

Emma sighed and pointed at the problem. Ethan pulled the textbook and sat next to her at the table. He grabbed another pencil and began scribbling on Emma's paper. After several minutes Ethan look up. Got it. He said. Emma had to admit, she was impressed, "You… got it?" She asked. Ethan smiled and nodded, "Ok well can you tell me how to do it?" Ethan nodded and began showing her the steps to solving the problem. When he was done, she looked at him, stunned, "Wow, Ethan that was impressive."

Ethan smiled, "well I owe it all to you." He smiled and pressed a kiss to her lips. They were getting into a studying make out break when Emma's phone rang. She groaned and sat up. Ethan looked at her, "Don't" He groaned pulling her back to his lips.

She pulled back again, "I can't. What if it's important?"

"Then they'll call back." He kissed her again.

She pulled away again, "Then I will have to get it then." She reached back for her phone and looked at the missed call notification, "Great, I missed it."

Ethan put his hand on her phone and pushed her hand down, "Good." He leaned in and kissed her again. She tossed her phone aside and wrapped her arms around Ethan kissing him deeper.


	24. Chapter 24

Emma sat in the cold dirt, pressing her back against the stone. She sucked in a breath and closed her eyes. She'd been at her father's grave for the last hour. Most of it spent putzing around, not sure of what to say. The crisp fall air blew through her long brown hair, "Why did it have to get this crazy?" She found herself saying aloud. She'd been wondering this since her father passed away. It wasn't like her life was ever normal by any means. As a matter of fact, this was the first normal life she'd ever had. But all the lies, the secrets, Derek's murder, Theresa's murder. Now her father's death. Was it all somehow connected? Did whoever killed Theresa and Derek have a hand in Ted's death as well? "All I ever wanted was a family. A mom, a dad. A sister." Emma looked down at her worn in converse, the same shoes she'd worn the day she stepped off that bus from Vegas and into the twisted life of her sister and her family.

A crunch of dried leaves and a woman's voice startled Emma, "There you are!"

Emma swirled around looking up, her birth mother looked down at her, "Were you looking for me?"

Rebecca smiled. Something inside Emma prompted her to run but some invisible force kept her glued to her seat, "I tried to call you, but I guess there is terrible reception out here."

Emma clenched her iPhone beside her, "Yeah. I guess." She faked a laugh.

"May I?" Rebecca nodded a gesture as if to ask if she could sit next to her daughter.

Emma looked at the empty space beside her, "Yeah." She said meekly.

Several minutes past as both mother and daughter looked out over the graveyard. Rows of headstones, and flowers seemed to go on for miles. When someone finally spoke, it was Rebecca, "Emma, Can I talk to you?"

Emma looked at her mother, "Sure." She said crinkling her brows.

Rebecca looked at her child, suddenly she saw through the eyes of a mother the beautiful child she'd abandoned 13 years ago. She reached up to brush a piece of her daughters hair off her face, but Emma dodged her hand. Rebecca removed her hand but kept her eyes on Emma, "You are so beautiful, you know that?" Maybe that wasn't the best starter, but she didn't know what else to say, "How did this all get so crazy?" Rebecca repeated her daughter's question.

"You know, all I wanted was a mother." Somehow every time Rebecca came around to bring up the past anger surged through Emma.

Rebecca nodded, "I know baby girl." Guilt found it's way to Rebecca's mind and she looked down, "And a father and a sister. All things you could have had if I wasn't such a shitty mother, I know."

Angrily Emma looked up at her mother, "No mom. It has nothing to do with your ability to be a mom. It has to do with the choices you made when I was a baby."

Instinctually, Rebecca shook her head, "You didn't know what was going on Emma. Do you know how badly it hurts to watch your daughter go to bed hungry? Knowing there was nothing you could do for her? Watching this helpless little girl starve because you couldn't afford to buy her a proper meal? I would have done anything for you, Emma."

"Then why didn't you call dad?" Emma said kicking a clump of dirt across Ted's grave site.

"He had no idea you were alive, Emma." Rebecca wanted to hug her daughter. She wanted to make things better, but no matter what the past had been written and there was no amount of words that could change the fact that Rebecca had abandoned Emma.

"So dumping me at a day care center was better than sucking your pride and telling Ted he had another daughter?" Emma's chest was heaving with anger now.

"No baby." Rebecca fought back tears now, "I knew the moment I walked out of that place that leaving you was a terrible decision. But it was all I had. I'd spent every last option. I did everything I could to keep you. Every employer who turned me away I begged them for a job. I need to feed my baby girl. I would cry. Emma you were _everything_ to me. I did nothing if it wasn't for you, Em. You have to believe me."

"Then why didn't you call my father? You gave him Sutton like it was nothing."

"I didn't give him Sutton like it was nothing! That was one of the hardest things I'd ever done, Emma. Aside from giving you up. But I couldn't keep two babies. But giving up you both? That was impossible Emma. So I kept you. It was the hardest choice I ever made. Which one to keep and which one to give your father."

Emma shook her head, "You talk about us like we're some kind of possession. Jesus, Rebecca! We are your daughters. Your children! And you just toss away like we're some kind of unwanted possession."

Rebecca wiped the tears from her cheeks, "It wasn't that easy, Emma! If I could have raised you both, I would have. But you weren't in that position. You didn't have to make the choice. But you have to understand that those choices don't define how much I love you and your sister."

"Oh yeah. As if you know what true love really is." Emma rolled her eyes.

"Oh, I don't" Rebecca challenged, "True love is begging every restaurant for whatever scraps they had to give your daughter something at night even if it meant not eating yourself. True love is fighting with your mother who didn't condone the life of her bastard granddaughter to give her a place to live and food to eat. True love is trying to do what you think at the time is best answer to giving your daughter something better than the shit hole she was living in. A life that in time, would have killed her. Even if, in hindsight, that choice wasn't the best. I know I'm not perfect, but I keep trying, Emma. You know why? Because your my daughter and I love you."

Emma's breathing had quickened now, tears slid down her cheeks. She looked at Rebecca, guilt in her eyes met her mothers, "Mom, I'm sorry. I just look at everything Sutton has and I think why wasn't I born her?"

Rebecca took her baby in her arms and rocked her like she'd down when she was a little girl, "Sutton's life, like yours, isn't perfect. There are so many things wrong in that family and all of it is because of what happened between your father and me. Sure Sutton lives a cushy lifestyle on the exterior but everything else in that girls life isn't cushy. She handles it differently, but she never had an ideal life."

Emma drew in a deep breath, her eyes heavy from crying, "She had daddy." Emma said softly. Somehow the sound of Rebecca's heart beating comforted her.

Rebecca felt like Emma had taken one last stab, "You had me, Emma. I'm sorry that I couldn't be a better mother. I'm sorry that I fucked up so badly and ruined your life. You were always the innocent ones. You and your sister. You never asked to be born into this family and yet, you were. Ted and I made this mess and you and your sister were burned the most because of it and you don't deserve that Emma. But you are the only real true love I have ever known. And you don't know what amazing joy you brought to my life."

Emma had to admit that she felt bad for her mother. However, it didn't negate or make up for the fact that the last 13 shitty years of Emma's life could have avoided if her mother had swallowed her own pride and called her father for help. Emma could have brought that fact up, but instead she pulled her head off of her mothers chest and looked at her. Her thumb brushed away a tear from Rebecca's cheek and she wrapped her arms around her mother, "I'm sorry, mom."

Rebecca hesitated but embraced her daughter, pulling her closer to her, "I know baby girl and I'm sorry too. I just want you to walk away knowing that everything I did for you was out of love because I thought it was going to be better than anything I could have ever given you. Understand that doing what I did, was the hardest thing I ever did and hearing you yell mommy please don't go! Made it all that much harder. I couldn't even look back at you because that would have been end game. I wouldn't have held the strength to keep walking. You were my whole world for those few short years and leaving you behind was the worst moment I had ever lived in my life and I'd lived through a lot of terrible moments."

Emma's tears fell harder now. Somehow it didn't matter that everything after that day and the day she got to Phoenix, were nothing but a blur of foster family after foster family. Neglect, abuse and a general feeling that she never fit in wherever she was no matter how hard the families tried accepting her. None of that mattered anymore. What mattered was that the search she'd been wanting since Elementary school had finally come to somewhat of an ending. She'd finally found her family. Even if it wasn't the family she'd dreamt about amongst the stars back in Vegas, it was a family and it was hers. Her mother, her father and her sister. Emma hugged Rebecca a little tighter.

She'd been in the embraced for several moments when she heard her phone buzz beside her. She pulled out of the hug to look at the screen: S.O.S. -Sutton. Emma's heart clenched. S.O.S was her code with Sutton and the group that something or someone was in trouble and never to be used unless in case of emergency. Emma wiped her tears off her cheeks, "Um, I don't want to break the mother-daughter bonding moment. But that was Sutton. She needs me." Emma stood up and grabbed her purse, leaving the bouquet of flowers she'd brought to leave at the grave.

Rebecca stood up too, "That's okay. Do you need me to take yo somewhere?"

Emma shook her head, "No. I have my car."

Rebecca nodded as Emma took off back towards her car. As Emma drove she GPS'd her sisters phone. She was home. Emma's heart pounded as she pulled into the driveway of the Mercer home. No other cars were in the driveway and she wondered where Sutton had left her car. She got out and headed into the house. Inside it was quiet, "SUTTON?!" Emma called out. Hoping she wasn't walking into a crime scene. The last thing she needed was to lose her sister too. There was no response. Emma's heart pounded so hard she swore it was going to pop out of her chest, "SUTTON!" She called again. She turned the corner to Sutton's room. Empty. There had been no one in the kitchen or the living room. What the hell? Emma thought. Then she heard noise. The sound of water running and Emma headed towards the sound. It got louder as she came up to Kristen's room, "Sutton?" Emma called a little softer this time.

"In here!" she called from Kristen's bathroom, Emma's heart sank as she headed towards the bathroom. She pushed aside the door to find the bathtub running, overflowing and flooding the floor. There was Sutton curled in the corner, her knees to her chest, head on her knees. Emma rushed to the tub, cutting off the water.

"Sutton's what's going on?" Emma said now moving to her sisters side.

Sutton lifted her head, looking into the mirror reflection of her twin sister. Her eyes were bloodshot and even though she didn't make it known, she was glad Emma had come, "I'm late, Emma." Sutton let it out in one swift breath.


	25. Chapter 25

"What do you mean you're late?" Emma asked taking Sutton's hand and pulling her up off the floor. It took her several moments before she saw that her sister was clenching something, Emma reached for it, "What is this?" She asked. Sutton looked down at her hand in her state of dazed confusion, she let the little piece of plastic slip from her hands, watching it crash to the bathroom floor. Emma bent down and picked it up, when she looked at it she realized what it was and dropped it back to the ground. She looked at her sister, her head shaking, "Sutton, seriously?"

Sutton just nodded. Even though she'd been sitting in that bathroom for hours crying, she felt another wave of tears course through her and she crashed into her sisters embrace, "I can't" She managed to mumble out.

Emma tightened her grip around Sutton, "It's going to be okay. We are going to get through this together, okay?" She looked at her sister in the eyes. Sutton nodded a confirmation, "Have you told Thayer yet? I assume it's Thay's?" Again Sutton nodded, shamefully. Emma grabbed her cell out of her back pocket, "You need to call him, Sutton."

Sutton pushed the phone away, "I can't, Emma" she sniffled.

"You need to tell him." Emma said pushing the phone into Sutton's hand.

"No! I need to wrap my head around this." Sutton said. She moved to the mirror, "God, I look like straight up hell." She said running her hands through her matted hair.

"Well right now, looking like a runway model is not top priority." Emma said moving beside her, her hand rested on the small of Sutton's back. She could feel how hard her sister was breathing and at that moment someone's voice rang through the house.

"Emma?" It was Kristen.

"Shit!" Sutton cursed. Suddenly she had snapped into reality. Forgetting her problem for a moment looking at the puddle of water that was soaking the ankles of her skinny jeans.

Emma swirled her sister around and looked deep in her eyes, "Everything is going to be okay. But right now, we need to figure out what the hell we are going to tell mom when she sees this."

"Emma?" Kristen called again, "Sweetie, where are you?"

Emma's heart pounded and she looked at Sutton, "Just grab towels and start cleaning. I'll go distract mom." Then she gave her sister a quick hug and ran out of the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

She found Kristen in the kitchen, unpacking a canvas grocery bag. Emma clasped her hands together and smiled, "Hi mom." She dragged out.

Kristen looked at her, "There you are, sweetie. Can you help me? I have a few more bags in the car."

"Sure." Then Emma headed towards the door. When she returned, both arms full of bags, she saw Kristen heading towards her room, "Mom!" Emma said quickly.

Her voice startled Kristen and she looked over at Emma, "What is it baby?" She asked moving towards her now.

Emma pretended to struggle with the bags, "Nothing. I just… I can't carry both bags, can you grab one?"

"Sure." Kristen said retrieving one of the bags from Emma's arms, "Have you seen Sutton? I haven't heard from her all day."

Emma's heart pounded, "Oh yeah, she texted me earlier. Said she'd be home later." She hated lying. But right now, she just hoped Kristen didn't walk into the Mercer Ocean before Sutton was able to clean it up. Kristen lifted a bag of toilet paper.

"Can you bring this to my bathroom, and grab a few for you and Sutton and Laurel?" Emma nodded and headed to the bathroom. Now was a good chance to check on her sister.

Sutton had just finished cleaning the last little bit of water when Emma opened the door, "How's it going in here?"

Sutton looked up from the floor, "I cleaned the water if that's what you're referring to."

Emma put the rolls of toilet paper in the cylinder holder next to the toilet where Kristen kept the extra rolls and looked at Sutton, "Here, you're going to need this in the next few months." Emma joked, handing her sister a fresh roll.

Sutton looked at her, "You're not funny." She said darkly.

"Ok, I'm sorry. But seriously, you are going to need to tell mom at some point." Emma said emptying the plastic bag of toilet paper and tossing it in the small metal trash bin on the other side of the toilet.

"Yeah, I know. I get it. But right now, can we please not talk about it?" Sutton said pulling the soaking wet towels up off the floor and putting them in the wicker hamper beside the shower.

"Yeah. Sure." Emma complied. She was about to leave when she stopped and looked back at her twin, "Hey Sutton?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you." She smiled.

Sutton looked up and smiled, "I love you too, Emma. Thank you."

Emma smiled back, "Anytime, sis." Then with that she turned and headed towards her bedroom. Maybe it wasn't the family she'd wished upon stars for, but it was her family and there was no better, more perfect group of people Emma could have ever wished for.

**Ok, So I don't know if I want to end the story here and start a sequel picking up from here or if you want me to just keep going. I guess it doesn't matter really. I just don't want it to feel like this story is dragging. I know something major just happened. But it's also a good place to begin a sequel. So let me know in the comments what you guys would rather want and I will try to make that happen! :) Thanks again for always reading! **


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